Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
Not sure if this is off-topic, or not. Putting the acronym out there, just in case. The question might ride better in an etymology forum, but I don't happen to be active in any of those just now and it is --I think maybe-- related to my cPTSD.
Getting past Trauma Induced Amnesia is a bear. What I call, "Remembrance Episodes" are still rough, but I believe I am getting better with the process. I only believe My faith in the process is not strong and. . . My memory is damaged. . . Be gentle, please. It is not as easy as flipping through a photo album or plugging terms into Google or Explorer. It is a fragile process.
My least favorite part of these remembrance episodes is that it is not possible to confirm or deny any of my childhood memories. These dramas took place coast-to-north american coast and even stable childhood memories are not the most accurate. As the therapist who guided me in developing the process I am currently working put it, "We can only do our honest best with the information available to us."
I am nearly ready to trust a body of memories which have been emerging over the last year or four. If my ifs are in alignment, they are a child's memory of a set of grown-up dialogs I overheard in the string of small towns I was raised in. This would have been the late 50's to early 60's. The memories are centered on the word, "Turncoat." I am far from certain, but I think the term was a reference to the Post WWII migration from farms to cities.
I have been able to confirm that the term fell out of common usage around the time I was (?) a child eavesdropping on adults. The folks who did use it in common talk are long gone, but. . . Anybody? What does, "Turncoat" mean to you?
-
Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
-
Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
If not, my family would have continued to gaslight me about everything that bothered me in my childhood, gaslighting me that I made it all up. The fact that the government had enough of them and deported them from another country, though, turned the tables on them and validated me. But not until 30 years had passed.
I've been very lucky the facts about my childhood have been sorted out in the end, but it was such a long process that I know what it feels like to think it will never happen. In the meantime, as your therapist said, I had to do as you've done: ""We can only do our honest best with the information available to us."
As to your question about "turncoat," I believe invisablefriend is right.
I'm pretty sure the small town grown-ups of my cPTSD flashbacks weren't using that definition, any more than I currently use the dictionary definition of, "Cool" when I compliment my grandson.
Research in progress. . .
Dunno. . . I often feel like I'm watching porno "Peanuts" cartoons when I am whelmed by these flashbacks. All the grown-ups sound like muted trumpets while the children try to figure out the meanings of life.
Grown-ups still often sound like muted trumpets to me. Some things never change.
Breathing. . .