Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
I am really struggling right now. I feel like no matter what I do I keep getting pooped on by the universe. While I know this feeling will pass, it has stuck with me all day.
I had surgery in November and while it was supposed to be routine I almost died. I wasn't healed enough by January and had to take the semester off of school (which harms our finances because I am getting paid to attend class). I am supposed to be meeting with a neurosurgeon in a week and a half regarding brain surgery.
Today I found out we lost our food benefits because we had "too much" cash on hand (I hadn't paid our rent yet). I tried explaining to the people on the phone that I could get a new statement to them (because our rent has now been paid) but I have to re-apply from the beginning.
This means no food assistance for a month, and may mean I have effectively lost my medical insurance. It took FOREVER for me to get an appointment with this specialist and I can't afford for the appointment to be pushed back (because I got a cancelled appointment; their next one is in July).
I'm freaking out. I plan to drop off a new application and submit all our new paperwork tomorrow but I am terrified I won't have insurance on the day I am supposed to go see the specialist. I am also worried if it takes them a while to re-approve everything I may get fined for NOT having insurance.
It just feels like a pretty awful position to be in. While I know it has to get better it feels like doomsday today. I haven't felt this physically awful since I had cancer and I'm struggling just to stay awake.
I tried to get groceries today and my pain levels and neurological condition were so bad I vomited in the store.
Ugh. Can I just NOT have to go through this?
I know things like this help teach people value (you value most the things you work for) and that it has to get better (because when you get so low the only way to go is up) but right now - today - I am not okay.
I think I'm okay not being okay, but I'm still nervous about my insurance situation, and now our food levels. Apparently student loans are now considered income and ugh.
I could use a vacation. :P I can't afford one, but I could sure use one, lol.
Are any of you having "one of those days" too?
I had surgery in November and while it was supposed to be routine I almost died. I wasn't healed enough by January and had to take the semester off of school (which harms our finances because I am getting paid to attend class). I am supposed to be meeting with a neurosurgeon in a week and a half regarding brain surgery.
Today I found out we lost our food benefits because we had "too much" cash on hand (I hadn't paid our rent yet). I tried explaining to the people on the phone that I could get a new statement to them (because our rent has now been paid) but I have to re-apply from the beginning.
This means no food assistance for a month, and may mean I have effectively lost my medical insurance. It took FOREVER for me to get an appointment with this specialist and I can't afford for the appointment to be pushed back (because I got a cancelled appointment; their next one is in July).
I'm freaking out. I plan to drop off a new application and submit all our new paperwork tomorrow but I am terrified I won't have insurance on the day I am supposed to go see the specialist. I am also worried if it takes them a while to re-approve everything I may get fined for NOT having insurance.
It just feels like a pretty awful position to be in. While I know it has to get better it feels like doomsday today. I haven't felt this physically awful since I had cancer and I'm struggling just to stay awake.
I tried to get groceries today and my pain levels and neurological condition were so bad I vomited in the store.
Ugh. Can I just NOT have to go through this?
I know things like this help teach people value (you value most the things you work for) and that it has to get better (because when you get so low the only way to go is up) but right now - today - I am not okay.
I think I'm okay not being okay, but I'm still nervous about my insurance situation, and now our food levels. Apparently student loans are now considered income and ugh.
I could use a vacation. :P I can't afford one, but I could sure use one, lol.
Are any of you having "one of those days" too?
I find creating food is good for my PTSD, and my site is slowly taking off, so I've got that going for me which is nice. :)
I'm sure there's some cosmic lesson on the great benefits of struggle and overcoming struggle, but yeah, today I am *not* in "class".
We'll be okay. Maybe not today, but we will be. And I sympathize. I've been stuck in "too poor for self-pay" and "too well off for help" so often and for so long, ugh and argh!
Big supportive vibes!
Let hope you can ask for a supervisor intervention. Show them your calendar of when you should have paid it, but your health has made it hard to keep dates straight.
I finally got help by getting a supervisor to manage my case until things were straightened out.
Can you apply for diability?
I picked a de-stressing activity and spent $5 at Goodwill today. I had a $5 off a $10 coupon and managed to snag a few pretty and colorful dish pieces to help me "stage" the food I make for pictures. :) I then came home and made a new recipe! I hadn't tried it before but you can actually make chocolate chip cookies in the microwave! I find this to be great because it helps limit my cookie intake, and I got a perfect photo using some of the new dishware. Since it's microwaved I didn't have to overly exert myself to make it happen and that was nice.
WarriorGal; I applied for disability when I had cancer (I was seeking short term disability for 11 months). By the time I got in front of a judge I was back in work and they denied me because "cancer is treatable." I was in my early 20's and using a walker (the kind with the bucket seat and handles). They told me that given my education I am able to work "minimum wage light part-time work-like activities." When I asked what that meant the judge just kinda shrugged at me.
I could try to seek disability now but I doubt they would actually approve it. If cancer didn't warrant closed disability, there's now way they would give me ongoing disability now. :-\
I'm sorry you're having one of those days too, Leo. They're the worst.
Jewells - I appreciate your use of the phrase "fighting for living." I have never heard it before and it fits the theme of the day. I'm going to hang onto it for a while (if you don't mind!).
Thank you Freedom and Lilly for the support. It means a lot to me to know I'm not alone in this.
Mujica -- may I ask what made them absurd? I sincerely hope it wasn't anything too terrible.