Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
Sex is a hugh trigger for my PTSD. I have to have a very gentle man who would want to make love to me because if it gets rough I flashback to my rape. It isn't as bad as it used to be. I rememebr punching my boyfirend in the face when he was to rough on me and I had not idea. So now I haven't had sex in donkeys years because I am afraid of hurting some one else.
I can relate. My abstinance started over 22 years ago. At first, it was a sort've "reclaiming," and then it evolved into a moral choice, however it also makes sense that the trauma DID contribute to aversion, at times (if not many times). For me (I am recalling now), dissociated/altered states that were embarassing, anger and tears. I don't recall that I hit anyone, but I do recall biting (breaking skin biting).
I was also discerning my faith when I started to reconcile with the trauma. My therapy began several years following that. I mean REALLY discerning. I now believe that sex ("making love") is best reserved for commitment and the sanctity of marriage. It is sacred...as it should be.
I am certain that I will need a man in my life who is willing to commit, who is sensitive, and who will be very understanding. I will also likely need counseling at that time because I am afraid of what will happen (now that I have gone through therapy, my awareness has changed). I am afraid of what will happen.
Sometimes I see abstinance as sort've a spiritual, emotional, and physical "cleansing," from which purity evolves.
Don't get me wrong. I am a sexual person, and believe that sex is healthy but within a healthy relationship that is based on love and commitment. I truly believe this now. I support you in any decision that will honor the dignity of your person (inside and out).
I laughed when I read how you said "Trust me. I can be a handful when my PTSD flares." Oh how I (and I am sure) others here can relate! My emotions can be so powerful that they can scare others and even scare me, too. A "handful" indeed!!!