I'm really sorry you're so low. I wish you could get real therapy like they do in the US. I wonder if RAINN has a branch in the UK. I wish you could move away from there to somewhere where you could get treatment. Even though your loved ones are keeping you from harming yourself, they are also (some of them) keeping you from getting the healing you need and deserve. Does your bf ever think of moving overseas?

Anyway, i've been saying this stuff for a long time and you don't need to answer. I am simply in awe of how long and how well you have tolerated so much pain and trauma. I hope and pray that someday you can get treatment and healing.

My new cpn said he was going to reffer me to psychtherapy but 1. I dont know if he actually did and 2. Theres waiting lists and we are only in the new city for a year so il doubt il get therapy. Therapy in england does suck. There maybe sexual abuse charities but ive never trusted them.
Thanks for replying.

Why not try them? (the charities)

i'm so sorry you're hurting.
It just isn't fair.

love&hugs

Patti i dont trust them to be able to cope with my autism and my struggle with understanding emotions.

You'll never know if you don't give it a try. Hugs.

Ive tried it years ago and i ended up psychotic sectioned in hosoital for a month. Id rather wait for a nhs psychotherapist.

Triple hugs my friend

((((Aspie)))))
I’m sorry you are hurting so much
Sending you lots of support & gentle hug <3

(never forget how amazing you are)

I wish I were well enough versed as to the ins and outs of the UK mental health system so as to offer a suggestion, but I'm not. I just finally got a handle on my own USA's mental health system as to my own treatment. I came back to the USA to check on my apartment, my car, bills, etc. but also to make sure I kept my monthly appointment with my psychiatrist, now that I've got one paid for via my job's private health insurance.

Lucky for me, he's going to retire to Panama about the time I'm going to retire to Mexico in 2 years, so I actually have a psychiatrist with support for my long term plans to become an ex-patriate. Not everybody gets how important that goal is my my mental health. It makes me feel like I'm moving toward something meaningful.

It sounds like you feel like you're stuck, though, Aspie, and I get how painful that is. When I feel stuck is when I am most at risk just to sink into depression quicksand. We're here for you, ok? You mean a lot to us here.

Thanks everyone. Hugs to all

Good news thats excited me. I maybe getting a kitten on sunday. Im so excited, ive wanted my own cat for 10 years.

Yay! Now THAT'S something to look forward to! Boy kitty? Girl kitty? Thoughts on names? :-)

Congrats! That's awesome.

Its a little girl kitten. I have no ideas on names yet. We will see what her chatacters like then name her. I think she suits the name daisy for some reason. Not usually a name id like. Strange.