I am sorry you are worried about your job. I have been there and in many ways I still am. There are a few things you can do to help. First give yourself permission to worry, but limit it to an hour a day and try to schedule it. Mentally when you schedule something your brain goes, oh ok we will do it then. It will take some practice but it does work. Next ask yourself, is worrying going to change the outcome? chance are the answer is no, it is what it is and if you lose your job you will not have a choice in the matter. What you do have a choice in is preparing for it. Sit down and figure out your finances, how much do you need to live on. Prepare your resume and cover letters. get on linkedin and other social media sites and post your resumes, etc. Take that hour of worry time and run over what you will do when your are told. How you will handle it, what you will say. Prepare a script if you have too. Just ensure you do not burn bridges. Now, sit down and decide what you want to do in your next job? Can you teach a smaller vocational school? Do you want to approach some mental health organizations and try and start a back to work program for those with mental health issues? Look over some job boards etc. Get excited to find and discover new career paths.
I know it is hard, not knowing when or if, but in any job anymore we are all just on borrowed time. Deep breath and take control, if we prepare, it takes away the unknown and therefore the PTSD symptoms will be less.

Some of both Muji.
I hope things are fixed, before they get worse. Also that your age ad wisdom, make you prime candidate for other colleges in you area of expertise.

I'm not sure how I would take a twenty something teaching me about death and dying, if they haven't really lived yet. Experience is on your side.

Do you want to approach some mental health organizations and try and start a back to work program for those with mental health issues?

Cool idea CC.

Yes, I think you did the right thing, to stay home and send out applications. if you'd gone away, you'd probably not have been able to enjoy it. And - the situation is very real, that you might lose your current job. Best to be prepared, is my take on it.

Thanks, Crazy Canuck, for the detailed suggestions. I took them all down. I really appreciate your summarizing what you learned in your job search with PTSD over the last year before you got your current job. It exactly hits the spot for any of us thinking about job and PTSD. Certainly does for me.

I acted on the part today about taking this as an opportunity to think about what I would want from my next job. As much as I love the classroom, I think I'd like to move into administration next, if it comes time to find another job. Coming to that conclusion took some thinking, but I'm 55 now and I think I have something to offer from that perspective. It' also time I made more money before retirement.

I hope I stay in my job, I won't lie. But following up on your suggestion to use it as a chance to ask some questions about the future really turned looking at jobs from an exercise in looking for a lifeboat to steering my own career forward. Thanks for that.

Now, to live up to that big suggestion: "First give yourself permission to worry, but limit it to an hour a day and try to schedule it."

That's the one that will really bring me peace. To balance against denial on the one hand, and obsessing on the other. It can be done. Posting here leaves worry here, I've found, so that's one way I'm going to try to limit worry and schedule worry into a routine that's manageable and doesn't take my life over.

Thanks!

Ooh, admin... Don't go to the dark side! I'd to the tutoring. How about substituting for public school? Do you have your cert for that? I like the setting aside time for the prepare vs rest. I'm in a similar position (as you know) and what I tell myself is that I don't need to decide it all in one day. I'll jump off each bridge when I get to it! : D

Deli, you made me laugh in a time when I needed it with that thing you said about not "going to the dark side" into an administration job. Still laughing out loud. Love your sense of humor. GRACIAS.

My school's in negotiations, so I'm a bit embittered at the mo-

I took all the admin cert classes, but didn't get the paper b/c I never wanted to do it.

You think you've got BS in your life now?

Glad I could make you laugh. We all need it.