Yah, I hate it when you feel good and then get whammied out of nowhere. Holidays and other triggers sneak up on me.

I'm working on pretending it's just like a storm that will pass through. Hang in there.

Yes, I've been doing a lot of work on integration. None have intgrated yet. Iguess I am even afraid to enjoy the peaceful moments knowing that around the corner is chaos again.

I am very fed up with where I am at this moment. However, there is an experience I have always had since I became aware of my limitations, my vulnerability, my survival reactions to the trauma I experienced, The unexpected return of symptoms of P.T.S.D., & panic attacks, the severe emotional breakdowns, the concentration & memory loss, the numbness of my emotions to the point that it looks like clinical depressions, the physical exhaustion resulting from the extreme stress our bodies, minds, emotions, and spirits are subjected to throughout this process of awareness, & recovery, the journey to healing & becoming a whole human being again, instead of a human doing.
It takes great strength & courage to walk through the reality of our traumatic experiences in life. It takes tremendous will & the powerful energy of love to do the work involved to come out the other side free from the bondage of this struggle. be gentle with yourself. You are a valuable human being, and we need to remember this about ourselves when we are in the thick of it all.
In Love Light truth & Service
"Stubborn" TerrieAnn