Hi. New here. I am in awe. I get sooo scared to ask b/c my life's been a long series of oh-no diagnoses (or so it feels).... I am impressed you can do so much.

My therapist tells me every visit that "It takes as long as it takes" and that as long as your overall average is "forward", then it's okay if it's not a good day every day. You just reminded me of that. Thank you.

You got through your closets in a day!1! What is your secret? I have 3 closets the size of gym lockers and I can't get through them in a single day.

How the rest of it works out for you matters a great deal, Cecil. This set of doctors and diagnosis might not matter in your healing, but your healing is all important.

Glad you are still working on it and exploring new options. Steady as she goes.

I get that it's slow progress as you say, but it wouldn't be fair if you weren't complimented for asking for your diagnosis and calling those psychiatrists. Talk about being proactive in your recovery! I know it's slow, but what an example you are. Inspiring. Hope you get called by Tuesday.

Killer Molasses huh?

Arfie, I only made it through one closet yesterday but I am back at it today.
Previous places I have lived had those gym locker sized closets. Amazing how much stuff one can cram in to them. All that annoying little stuff.

When I was little I used to hide in a closet for safety. Now when I need a new beginning I clean them out. I am not sure if that means I am making room to go back inside or if I am tossing out the old useless junk.

Do you feel like the depression, dysthymia and anxiety are symptoms of PTSD? And like by leaving out the PTSD diagnosis you are not really focusing on the right thing? That's how I feel. I've gotten the Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and Major Depression diagnoses.

For me, it feels like I'm being misdiagnosed and misunderstood.

Journal Reader, for me, getting all worked up over a diagnosis and then getting more opinions then trying to find the right therapy/therapist is just another way to avoid exploring my feelings and the scary stuff. Besides just like we can have high blood pressure and diabetes and eczema, I suppose we can have more than one psych diagnosis.
That is just my thoughts for me though. Others may have a different experience.

I asked my therapist about diagnosis because there are times when I am afraid that my mind is really broke and there is no way to fix it. Kinda like when someone feels a lump and diagnoses themselves with cancer even before they see a doctor.

Cecil, I, too, believe that getting lost in what to call it and which expert is the best match for the label mostly distracts me from the hard work of healing that scary emotional stuff I barely even have words for.

Balance in all things. Having words to describe "IT" and names for the organic filing system was an important step in my recovery. Even the many cases where the names and vocabulary have changed radically since I started therapy in 1972 are easier because I have already absorbed the concept.

I shoot for balance between arguing labels and letting a heartache be a heartache by whatever name you want to call "IT." What I call the many "ITs" of my trauma matters, but not enough to shoot the messenger or derail my hopes of healing.

Yah, exploring feelings sure is scary. In my case, I have to trust the person I'm exploring with. Otherwise I just try on my own and - not to knock trying - it's just so much more effective when I have someone knowledgeable and experienced to help me figure out what is going on in my life. I've found the only help to be when I trust the therapist or doctor understands. So, it's pretty important to me that they label me correctly. Otherwise I am too scared they are going to harm me.

I also felt like my mind was broken. I still see PTSD as more of a brain injury than a disorder. Injuries can be treated quite well and heal. Sometimes they have to be acknowledged because they hold a person back in some areas of life.

Arfie, I could be getting lost in labels, but I hope not. Or perhaps it's just and individual thing - like how most injuries heal differently.

I'm glad to have come across this discussion, CecilBGreen. I didn't see it as venting, whining, or complaining in any way. I saw it as a very valid and concerned post. I guess it might have made me a little edgy because I'm angry that nobody sees your depression as urgent. You deserve to be heard - especially because you are seeking help (and practicing self-care).

Trust is huge. I mostly trust my therapist. Trust is a hard thing for me. I have to trust that he has my best interests in mind. I have had psychiatrists completely invalidate me in the past or tell me I should be locked away forever.

It is in my nature to have a little doubt at all times but I trust he is in my corner....took me since July to get there. If I disagree with him he listens. He never tells me how I feel and I think he does his best to connect with me.

Maybe it comes down to trust and we all have different ideas of what trust looks like.

I am convinced that insurance companies/brokers of evil minions. I really dislike psychiatrists myself so I can understand that. Things would be a lot nicer if we didn't have to answer to corporations.

I am sorry you are caught in a tangled web JR. Sending positive vibes your way!

Nobody can get you lost in labels like a bureaucrat. Especially the insurance bureaucrats. Here in the US, they want you labeled all the way to your great-great-great-grand's mistress. All simple enough to fit on a driver's license... Good luck with that.