I don't know how old you are. I'm on the far side of 50.

I never "threatened suicide".

I dreamed of it. It was my hope, my wish, the only thing that got me through my childhood. Every night when I went to bed, it was the thing that allowed me to sleep, to face the nightmares, As my heart broke every morning when I woke up, it was the thing that gave me the strength to face another day.

Decades passed and things got better. I'm no longer suicidal. In fact, I can't even force myself to "feel" it anymore...but I'll never, ever, ever forget.

I agree, this is "it"...the one chance. But for me anyone, your approach, would have driven me to take the final steps to complete the act. I'm guessing that you mean well...but I'm guessing too, that you don't have a clue about how it was for me to go through.

Ummm.... I've been suicidal off-on since age 11. And the kind where it's not "Oh shoot me now I had a bad day", but the kind where it was serious end-my-life. I don't threaten it. I don't discuss it. When I am suicidal, I may tell people *now*, but I'm not threatening to do it, I'm trying to work through the abyss. When I attempted, I attempted. No threats, no talk, nothing. Me, knife, and only-dumb-luck I'm still here.

So while I don't know you or anything about you... Your approach is a bit off-putting to me, personally, and hey, you guaranteed I'll never ask you to help me through the abyss. Peace, out.

We need to have empathy for those who are in such a deep dark place.
Empathy.

It is good for you to talk about your feelings in a personal way. This seems to be a very hot subject for you. Why is that?

This is a very hostile way for a new person to join a support group.

For a first post, ya kinda used the language that got us here. So it bristles. Many here have more than enough experience with what "modern media" says, and for many it was to stifle!.
I don't appreciate a warning in a hello.
So drink your coffee and read a bit, you might be surprised with what we have learned about coping collectively as a group over the years.
BTW.
Welcome to the forum Tesla, I'm sorry you had to find us for what ever reason(s).
J.

Tesla, There used to be a line below the comment box that said. "I_______promise to be kind. " Many that are here use that same thought without being prompted. But you will find it in the rules of the road in the terms at the bottom of the page.. Comments to others on their post is a place to keep this in mind. Get to know people before a little bit, it helps.
If for you there is something that is causing this need to state, we also have a journal feature that you can use and set to the privacy you wish . I find this has helped to sort my feelings and triggers. Your views are your own but don't attack us with them

J.
https://support.dailystrength.org/hc/en-us/articles/207778973-What-are-the-Rules-of-the-Road-

I used to have to visit the psych ward as a hospital chaplain (until kidney disease changed careers for me) every Monday. At my hospital the weekend was the time when most suicide attempts happened.

I've spoken, then, to more survivors of suicide attempts than most people. I understand what shows behind what you wrote about defending ideas, but I don't think you need to be concerned about that. By the time I met folks who had that struggle, it was the calm after the storm. Some had bandages on wrists, some had stains around mouths from the charcoal drink used when stomachs are pumped.

In all cases it was a time for peace after a terrible war within them nearly tore them apart. I never argued with any of them about their reasons for it. Some may have seemed great to me, others may have seemed small, but what mattered was what they seemed to them. Isolation was the big factor for them all, and connection on those Mondays was the thing to bring them back. No shame, just a welcome back to the world.

TW

I have a friend now who is in his 50s like me. He tried to commit suicide with a shotgun when he was 18. It took away his teeth and his nose, but he lived somehow. He went on to be married and has a grown son now. We're all music fans, so we go to concerts together. I know them from a church where I'm guest preacher regularly, so after my sermons it's with them that I have the best talks reflecting on thoughts about life and faith and hope.

I find him to be more caring about life because of what he went through. His wife died of cancer last year, and I was honored by his request to lead the ceremony at her funeral. Their love was a great testimony to what can happen after getting a second chance at life.

Mine wasn't after a suicide attempt. It was after surviving a couple of homicide attempts, times someone tried to kill me in a war zone where I was a missionary kid. In my case the bomb didn't catch the car's gas tank on fire and the gun to my head jammed when the trigger was pulled--twice.

Given miracles like that, I felt it mattered to make a second chance at life work out. I didn't know how a person does that, there is no manual for second chances. So it wasn't easy, but that's why those of us who know life and death from being on the edge, however we got there, can have empathy for knowing that place and can share knowledge others will never have. We can be strong enough to overcome the terrible fear we know from having been where few have been and lived to tell the tale. We can do that to give each other support no one else can give, and in giving support we get stronger ourselves.

That's what I know about daily strength. It's always a humble process daily, up for daily discussion, which is why I need to come here every day.

We can all respectful agree to disagree here..... I have found a way to try and look at suicidal thoughts as a symptom and to be aware that it's a symptom of a disorder..... It took time and effort to come to that.... These thoughts are part of an illness.....

I see this seems to be a big trigger for you..... We are here if you'd like to discuss it..... Big hug.....xo

I was almost successful in June. Hot topic for me. I am with Suncloud.

All the preaching and stern warnings people try to dish out? For me they just don't matter in the thick of it. Its one life of many for me