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The meeting that didn't take place last Thursday is taking place tomorrow. I'm talking to my disruptive student's adviser and the director of the program in which I'm her teacher tomorrow, asking them to support me. To do that I'll have to explain that after 5 years of seeming to manage my PTSD without meds, now I'm getting triggered here at the end of the semester, and that her disruption is triggering me right now. I'll have to explain that from Tuesday's doctor's appointment on I'll have medication that will help me with my triggers. So I'll only need their support from now until May 7th. That's going to be a hard sell, but it's the truth, even if it makes me look bad.
In the next meeting with my college Vice President I'm following up on the PTSD plan I submitted a month ago to him and to the tenure committee before they made their decision. After talking with other faculty, I've decided it would be better if I stopped teacher the lowest level classes to the newest freshmen. That's exposing myself to students who don't know their way around a college classroom and are scared of school until they learn their way around and settle down. Their fear triggers me, and so we have misunderstandings. I'm more comfortable teaching the higher level classes, and students are more comfortable with me. Less triggers.
The same goes for my death and dying class. Over the summer I can remove the unit on war and military suicide and just end the course with Tuesdays with Morrie and what a good death looks like. I don't need to risk triggering myself with my own near death experiences growing up in war like I've been doing.
More than anything I'm hoping that the medication from Tuesday on helps me with sleep, because I'm really having a lot more insomnia than I've had in a long time. I had it last night again. I was sleep deprived all the way to my church preaching engagement this morning and back again. I managed to do a good job, folks liked my sermon, but then I came straight home and collapsed on my couch for hours. I hope I get through the week ok.
By the way, this Saturday I fly to Boston to be keynote speaker at a big church ceremony up there for an old friend. Wish me luck. Yikes. I can see how hard it will be feeling like I do now, while at the same time I can see how things might go wrong on my new medication (like Seroquel). Oi.
In the next meeting with my college Vice President I'm following up on the PTSD plan I submitted a month ago to him and to the tenure committee before they made their decision. After talking with other faculty, I've decided it would be better if I stopped teacher the lowest level classes to the newest freshmen. That's exposing myself to students who don't know their way around a college classroom and are scared of school until they learn their way around and settle down. Their fear triggers me, and so we have misunderstandings. I'm more comfortable teaching the higher level classes, and students are more comfortable with me. Less triggers.
The same goes for my death and dying class. Over the summer I can remove the unit on war and military suicide and just end the course with Tuesdays with Morrie and what a good death looks like. I don't need to risk triggering myself with my own near death experiences growing up in war like I've been doing.
More than anything I'm hoping that the medication from Tuesday on helps me with sleep, because I'm really having a lot more insomnia than I've had in a long time. I had it last night again. I was sleep deprived all the way to my church preaching engagement this morning and back again. I managed to do a good job, folks liked my sermon, but then I came straight home and collapsed on my couch for hours. I hope I get through the week ok.
By the way, this Saturday I fly to Boston to be keynote speaker at a big church ceremony up there for an old friend. Wish me luck. Yikes. I can see how hard it will be feeling like I do now, while at the same time I can see how things might go wrong on my new medication (like Seroquel). Oi.
First and foremost, the student that didn't do the test when it was due is at fault, then complaining because you didn't grade it fast enough for her when you were grading the students that kept up? She needs the reality check, not you putting any of the onus on your PTSD.
You know I am a student and I would not expect a professor to drop everything when I was late, that is just not the real world. Much less whine about it, to someone else higher up because I was lazy.
My professors here set a time to do work, if it's not met, you lose points off your score. So even if I get 100%, I will receive 90% if it's a week late, if it's more, I can expect another 5%reduction for each day, for MY benefit. Not as punishment, because I need to take my assignments and time management of classwork as seriously as my professor does when he teaches me. If I am late, then I would expect to have to wait (and have) when he is done with the current grading, not the other way around.
Your meds and treatment are not and should not be part of the discussion at all( That is actually a form of self blame, when she was the one making poor choices) for her not doing the work in a timely manner or the self serving behavior of thinking she has more rights than others in the class that do their work and manage their time.
Think about this part, it could also be a self sabotaging move too by you after the stress of waiting on the tenure decision.
This is not an elementary school. College for students is a Choice, no one forces them to go in the U.S. They choose to go an pay for the privilege, and are expected to ask for help before things become a problem.
So look at the time lines on your syllabus and give her a copy to read at the meeting. Ask for a valid explanation why the test wasn't done in a timely manner. Excusable if she was in surgery, but not if it was for recreational diversions)
You will take care of students that keep up first out of respect for their commitment and she should also respect the others in the class as well by keeping up. Ask her advisor if he thinks she needs tutoring to catch up before the semester ends and have him set it up.
Hugs of support, Student Jewell
Good luck Muji in the church ceremony!
for...some reason she is complaining about your not having graded her makeup test at the same time as the on-time students next test?????
nope, no way, this hasn't anything to do with your PTSD - please do not let it have anything to do with that, Muj.
the school has been allowing your students to bully you and get away with it - even backing them up. again, not about your PTSD, just them backing up the students for whatever reason instead of you.
big hugs and much support
Well said, J.
I take Aterax, but someone unconditioned would look like they had narcolepsy at my dosage on the onset.
You only have a few weeks left of this yerm and then a few weeks off to let them stabilize, maybe consider a wait and use your tools as you have been as well as the meletonin for sleeping, just until classes are over.
Hugs J.