I miscarried at 15 weeks when I was 18.
Since then, I've had nightmares some nights after a long stressful day, especially if I've seen babies a lot throughout the day.
Most of the time my nightmares are of similar themes. Either I lose my infant in a crowded store or at a beach or even if I am pregnant and go to the doctor and there is actually no baby, just an empty womb.
The other night I had a nightmare unlike any other I've had since. I'm now 21 almost 22 and in the 3 or so years since my miscarriage, I have never had such a gory and detailed recollection of my actual miscarriage. I could feel the pain, both emotional as well as physical, and I am struggling to overcome the urge to sleep with someone again in hopes of getting pregnant. I am not usually sexually attracted to men but when I feel this desperate to become a mother I am willing to do whatever it takes.
And that scares me because I am not financially ready to be a mom but I feel like I was stripped of my chance and I'm afraid there is something physically wrong with me and that I might not ever be able to have a child.
Muji asked me to let his wonderful friends here know that he's had a crisis with his kidney disease and has been admitted to the hospital I know he'll miss everyone here and he could really use our prayers, good thoughts and hugs I hope that you heal quickly Muji..... You will be missed..... You are in my thoughts and prayers sweetie.....xo
I am a young lot struggling from depression. I was getting so much better until my favorite teacher and friend passed from horrible Cancer. After the loss of my biggest supporter. I am spiraling back in to depression and anxiety. I also now have Anerexia and I’m un sure of what to.