Im the boring parent

Im the mean parent

I say no

I make them go to sleep

I don’t have money for friends or family for support or fun or celebrations 

He had them the day my church did our Easter Egg hunt and picnic 

He is scheduled to have them Easter and won’t discuss sharing. I’m trying again anyways.

 I have never cried so much over something so stupid. They’re so young, it’s clearly for me. I want the memories. I want the pictures. I want to be there for the firsts. I hate all of this. I’m so depressed and I’m so tired of waiting on a good counselor who sticks around.

If I could be compared to a food, I would be the baked potato I left in the oven for eight hours a couple months the ago. 

There is no Handbook. I’m tired of adult life being just as hard or harder than the things that got me to check out DS in the first place. I’m so tired of feeling broken and upside down and isolated.