(((((Mujica))))))
I’m so sorry you’re hurting. Pain sucks!
Sending you lots of support
I will be keeping you in my prayers
*I wish I could take both of our pains away
Gentle hug <3

Amigo, I want to heal it for you so much.

Lean on us. We got you.

Gentle hug Muji..... I am so sorry to hear it..... I hope that some rest gives you relief..... Another hug and a blessing.... xo

Thanks for the support, y'all. It's weird how I'll have a bad day like yesterday, and then a great day like I'm glad to report that I had today! It's like my physical body is bipolar or something with this Chronic Kidney disease the PTSD meds overdose left me. I kept reviewing the good days and bad days looking for a pattern I might use to predict one or the other, but so far I'm not cracking the code. So thanks for rolling with it so nicely when I have such a bad day that I can't be very supportive here on DSPTSD. It seems to just be a matter of once day and then I recover my DAILY STRENGTH.

Oh, boy. As my CKD progresses, less oxygen gets into my bloodstream. By the time my blood gets to my extremities--my feet, my hands, my head--it's just not enough. When my head's affected I pass out, something I've done 5 times now. When my feet are affected, a starved nerve in my feet dies.

It's been happening for years, and all that could be done was to measure it. I'd go to a kidney doc twice a year, and he'd stick needles in my feet, up my ankles, and up my legs to see how far up I had dead nerves now. At this point, it's half of both legs, meaning all of the way up to my knees.

That's why I walk with my cane. I still have the upper leg function, so though I've been confined to a wheel chair three times, eventually with a lot of effort I can hobble around pretty well with a cane.

Nerves are still starving, though, usually at the rate of three a week or so, in one leg or in the other. Yesterday, though, on Thanksgiving Day of all days, I had the rare day when a nerve died in each leg at the same time. That really hurt. When the nerves starve, they don't go out quietly, they go out with a lightning bolt of protest that lasts hours. That happened in both legs yesterday afternoon for me.

Still, today I got myself outside and walked 1.3km on my cane with my dog. Still truckin' in spite of all. Thanks for your support with it. I can't even take aspirin for the pain because aspirin and all other painkillers but Tylenol are kidney processed. Palliative care, then, it all a struggle of mind over matter, and your support is the x factor in my pulling that off.

On Thanksgiving Day, then, I was really thankful for your support.