kinda know how you feel.

just i go to the drs and they don't find anything wrong. almost completely missed my appendix even. i'm convinced i'll keel over one day. lol and i'm the one capable of mircaly healing broken bones ect on anybody else.

i hope that helped....

I am terrified of the mere idea of eing touched, prodded, tested, poked, etc. It takes Hubby and Xanax and lots of breathing exercises and meditations and even then I can melt down at the doc's office---and if I need to go to a clinic in a hospital like at my neurologist? I might as well be sedated for two days ahead of time---if only I could be!

Gentlest purring to you. I know the fear and I know the trepidation. It's as if the illness or potential illness isn't nearly as bad as the immediate fear of those alien hands near me. Eep!

jImagine that we are around you like a warm shield of light. That's what I'll think about for you:-)

No need to apologize at ALL! : )

Of course fears are irrational... That's the definition of emotions, right?

You are entitled to feel that way.

I'd suggest saying to them upfront, "I'm really sorry and this is no reflection of your abilities or my opinion of you, but I really have issues with people handling me. Can you please take your time and tell me ahead what you are going to be doing to help my anxiety?"

They may appreciate that and be extra gentle.

Yes, that'll be good. Thanks for the script!

Keep us posted on how it goes, okay?
I often take notes and a notebook, so I can write down what is said by docs etc and not forget from being so scared.
And as y'all here know, when I had to face Big Scary University System a couple weeks ago, my therapist and p-doc sent them letters saying "Do not touch our patient unless she says it's okay!"
So it might be wise to have the hospital system note in your file that you have touch/restraint issues. I'm flagged at the GP, and the ER, so it's always useful.

Big hugs and borrow my roar if you need it,
Leo

the best I have for you today mi Amigo.

I'm counting down to the appointment now. Less than 2 hours to go. I'm REALLY comforted by these posts in the meantime. Seriously. Thanks to you all!

Happy thoughts to you right at this very moment Muji!

1 Dr appmt today-cyst not malignant, no surgery needed, got a shot instead.

Another Dr's appmt tomorrow for the ultrasound. Much handling there. Hm.

Congrats - both on getting through the first apt and for no surgery needed!

I did not get online in time to chime in. Doctors ARE the reason for my PTSD - and further dealings with them just continues to reinforce it. When I get to the VA hospital I have to be already ON tranquilizers and enough pain meds to make darn sure I am numb. I am still at about even odds if seeing a new Dr if I am going to wind up in a corner screaming in the fetal position around my Service Dog until I pass out.

Needless to say, hubby goes through hoops to try to keep me CALM when we go into see any doctor, new or otherwise. The first thing that is explained to the Dr is that the main reason for my Service Dog is my PTSD that is derived from Doctors... This usually chills doctors into slow motion around me. If it doesn't, after I come around, we find a different doctor for me to see.

Hugs and hope that tomorrow comes out ok!

Yadlim and critters

YAY!!! I was thinking about you last night. But I didn't want to post a "how'd it go"... Wanted to let you update when you were able.

I go to a chiropractor. I LOVE it. His touches are healing. Quite different from my past.

How about using it as therapy- to allow someone to touch you in a kind way. You deserve it.

Thanks, Deli. I appreciate how you were thinking of me. As for therapeutic touch, oh yes! Before I moved to the country from Chicago I used to have a relationship with a massage therapy school and the students gave me discounted massages every week. Ah, I miss that.

Trigger Warning

Thankfully, i's touching in a medical context that makes me twitchy, not massage or physical therapy. I had a simple bee sting when I was a kid, and my mom overreacted to it and had it treated like a big deal and took me to an ER. When it was doctored acid was poured on my arm by mistake instead of alcohol. The bottles looked similar. I got 1st, 2nd, and 3rd degree burns from it and had my arm in a sling for months. Still have the burn scar.

The ultrasound this morning is probably just going to be gooey. That's what I'm making myself think. A lot of women here have probably had ultrasounds. I'll let you know if it's a boy or a girl. (Ha!)

Twins?

It WAS twins, jewells!

:-)

Thanks for letting me ask for support and joke about it at the same time, everybody. It turned out to be ok. The technician was clueless about my condition, of course, just getting the "pictures" done for the radiologist to read. At first she said, "Oh, just here for a checkup, huh? Nothing's wrong." So I had to go, "No, it's stage 3 kidney disease, um....." Like "no, that bottle isn't the one with the alcohol, that's the one with the acid....."

The factory model of medical treatment is so rushed. But it turned out to be fine. There's not much harm that can be done with an ultrasound wand anyway, you know? And I was really glad I wasn't left sitting in a room with one of those hospital gowns on and my derriere hanging out. That I'm really grateful for.