I thought since this is a habit I suspect I'm going to find VERY hard to break I'd start a thread on it... so that anyone who wants to have a peek at it, can ask questions, add ideas, wrestle with this beastie! I don't have any answers... I probably do have... lots of questions : )

Hugs, Caballita (little Filly)

The comments below are FROM... (they aren't MINE!! lol) http://www.myshrink.com/counseling-theory.php?t_id=13 by Dr Suzanne LaCombe

"There are a number of theories about the dissociative process. Here's one working model:

We experience dissociative states when our nervous system is strained to the limit. We're "too full". In other words, we've inadvertently taken in more stimulation than the nervous system can handle.

Life circumstances can overwhelm the nervous system at any time in our growth or later, for example through physical traumatic events. Unresolved issues and traumas can ignite the dissociative pathways.
It's a matter of degree.

Think of the operating system in a computer. When its' maximum capacity is reached it shuts down inessential software programs in order to save its resources for critical functions, while ensuring that important files are not lost. In effect, the brain does the same thing. When maximum nervous system processing capacity has been reached, the dissociative mechanism comes on line and shuts down less important systems such as our ability to concentrate.

This doesn't always work to your advantage in a modern world. For example, even if you wanted to study for that midterm your nervous system could have other plans!

Dissociation is a type of freeze response

To the degree that you are dissociative, will be the degree of impairment in your ability to take appropriate fight or flight responses (e.g. being physically threatened). In other words, you are more likely to move into freeze whether you want to or not (e.g. freezing at gun point during a bank robbery).

You won't notice when you start to dissociate.

Dissociation comes on-line seamlessly and automatically. That is, you probably won't recognize the moment you start dissociating. As mentioned above, dissociation occurs when too much arousal is triggered in the nervous system. Shutting down some functions saves enough energy for backing up survival-related strategies, such as awareness of non-verbal behaviors in others, or where the door is, etc.

By shutting out irrelevant sensations, enough energy is saved to power optimal cortex (cognitive) and limbic (emotions) functioning.

Parenting Tip

Sadly, unresolved childhood issues can easily be triggered when you take on the role as a parent. Even if you vowed to parent differently those old pathways remain, preventing you from being the attuned, caring parent you want to be. For instance, you may still be able to change your baby's diaper, feed her, even sing to her and play with her, except it feels mechanical, as if one is cut off from one's own heart.

Counselling Tip

Dissociation is like fake relaxation. It numbs your body and your emotions so you feel nothing. It can be akin to a blissful state and as such, can be deceiving to you and your therapist when you attempt relaxation therapy.

If you have a tendency to dissociate and you attempt to do a relaxation technique you may be merely moving into dissociation instead of a relaxation state. Similarly, if you like to meditate all you may be doing is moving into dissociation.

Dr Suzanne LaCombe "Speaking as a client."

It was enormously helpful when my own therapist helped me to recognize when I would start to dissociate in the session. Somatic therapy enabled me to develop increasing capacity to manage larger amounts of stimulation. And, with the help of a good grounding technique I was able to increasingly move out of it. (Grounding helps to discharge the energy.)

As my nervous system became more regulated (i.e. it could handle higher amounts of stimulation) I became less dissociative overall. Once I began to recognize it in myself outside the session, I could take steps to reduce my stimulation in order to reduce it (i.e. make the room quiet, have a hot bath, turn off the radio etc.). So today, whenever I feel dissociative I see it as a sign that my nervous system is maxing out.
BTW, if you're tired of the fogginess and haven't used counselling in the past, there's one very easy way to begin: Try an on-line therapist...

Especially for Therapists

Dissociation is a major stumbling block to progress in therapy because it severely diminishes the client's ability to be present. It's a significant barrier for working on trauma and developmental issues in particular because it can mask the client's true psychophysiological state. Without a clear picture of what's happening, the therapist can't monitor, let alone regulate, the client's level of activation.

Diane Poole Heller likens dissociation to a circuit breaker shutting off when house wiring gets overloaded. She warns that care must be taken in working with dissociation:

"If this is not done slowly, as we are proposing, often what happens is similar to switching the electrical breakers back on without doing something about the over load that caused the breaker to go off in the first place. If therapists have the client connect too quickly, they can often re-traumatize them." pg. 32.

Dr Suzanne LaCombe Speaking as a Therapist

My experience in clinical practice indicates that deep "talk therapy" therapeutic work is not the optimal choice if the client is severely dissociated. As Heller suggests we risk adding to the client's condition by attempting to add more material to the client's already full container.
no digging sign

However, skills must be in place as attempts are made to remove the dissociative "cap" so that the high activation underneath can be dispensed in a titrated, gentle way. Once dissociation is reduced and some resiliency restored to the nervous system, it is far easier to monitor activation levels and move the client through the material.
It's been my impression, however, that many therapists haven't been trained to recognize dissociation. (The subject never even came up in my doctoral education.) They thus risk strengthening dissociative symptoms by prematurely dealing with issues that the client's nervous system is as yet unprepared to process."

References

Heller, Diane P. (2001). Crash Course: A Self-Healing Guide to Auto Accident Trauma & Trauma Recover. Berkely, California: North Atlantic Books.