Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
I feel totally defective and so frustrated with everything. I have to get my psychiatrist to actually diagnose me with it but it's probable that I have something called somatic symptom disorder. It's another mental disorder and it becomes my eighth one. It's bad enough to have 7 mental disorders oh, why did I have to get another one? Of course if I I am logical about it oh, I realize that this is not my fault because one of the causes of it is childhood sexual abuse. It's just another residual effect of what my father did to me. All of my mental disorders are because of him and yet I ended up blaming myself and feeling totally defective. I'm still trying and still persevering and still enduring, and I'm still really fed up. I've gained so much weight recently and there's no logical reason for it. I haven't had any change in my eating pattern. For the most part I'm staying on my meal plan that I had when I got treated for my eating disorder and yet here I am so many pounds heavier and looking so much fatter than I ever wanted to. I know that I am not my size I am who I am inside. That however does not help my clothing fit. I keep having to buy new clothes because my old ones do not fit me anymore and this is frustrating because I am poor and do not have the money to spend on extra clothes when I already have a closet full and dresser full of clothes. Unfortunately they don't fit anymore. I tried breathing and meditating to try to relax and get through this and it doesn't work because I am always in a full-blown panic attack. I'm so antsy anymore that I just can't sit still unless I'm doing something very active. I feel like I am always on the go and totally Restless oh, so when these guided meditations tell me to sit in a comfortable position and breathe and imagine things, I'm able to listen for about 2 seconds and then two seconds and then turn it off. I'm just really overwhelmed and tired of dealing with all of this. Really could use a hug and a permanent fix which I know is not going to happen
-
Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
-
Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
Have you ever tried a walking meditation? Google them. It is good for people who cant be idle long. Maybe give it a try. See if it helps.
This link is to a good article about walking meditation
Counting all of these as "diagnoses" instead of reactive symptoms of developmental abuse and negligence, is like working to fix a chimney that has a structural fault in fireplace.
We were too small to stop the abusers, as an adult we are the worst self-blamers, because we don't remember the child's eye trust, size and strength of our small selves and the need to feel we did things right, when "right" was not our definition, but that of a person in power that groomed us to to what they wanted.
All of this colors our reactive symptoms anytime the web of our development is triggered by something even mildly similar. We go to what we can control. Even if it is obsessive to the point of causing their own symptoms, it still starts at the foundation.
Hugs and support. J..
Somatic symptom disorder only means you are overly conscious and thinking about bodily functioning and processes. That itself will raise enzymes and acids in your digestion. There by causing some physical dysfunction...A cycle brought on by thought.
Try not to be hard on yourself sweetie... You don't deserve it
Some of the psych meds can cause weight gain due to acting on the same area of the brain as the appetite centre..... xo