Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
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Hey guys, I've got a question for you all, and it's a serious one. How do you deal with anxiety???
I have PTSD and you would think that in my 28 years I'd have dealt with anxiety before today but I haven't. I've dealt with all manners of emotions, nervousness, and even had breakdowns but I have never had this particular feeling before. I have narrowed it down as a feeling of negative anxiety (opposed to the kind you might get before giving a speech that can actually be positive).
I'm overly emotional, crying for no discernable reason, and I have the impulse to want to bury myself under the covers of my bed and never come out again. Despite the fact I'm crying I don't feel depressed or suicidal. I just feel anxious and jittery. I think my feelings are impacting my neurological condition (I know stress can make it worse so I imagine anxiety can too) and my physical state, in turn, is making my emotions feel worse.
I'm not flashbacking and I'm not caught up in my past. I really can't discern what might be wrong other than I am going through a med adjustment for my neuro issues and my body is on the fritz. Grounding techniques aren't working and I already tried looking at my favorite funny videos but I felt a general sense of nothingness. No change. Indifference to it, I guess. I had a hysterectomy years ago so I know it's not a 'time of the month' issue or pregnancy so I am really at a loss here.
I could use help; to those of you who have anxiety what do you all do to help combat your anxiety when it comes along?
I have PTSD and you would think that in my 28 years I'd have dealt with anxiety before today but I haven't. I've dealt with all manners of emotions, nervousness, and even had breakdowns but I have never had this particular feeling before. I have narrowed it down as a feeling of negative anxiety (opposed to the kind you might get before giving a speech that can actually be positive).
I'm overly emotional, crying for no discernable reason, and I have the impulse to want to bury myself under the covers of my bed and never come out again. Despite the fact I'm crying I don't feel depressed or suicidal. I just feel anxious and jittery. I think my feelings are impacting my neurological condition (I know stress can make it worse so I imagine anxiety can too) and my physical state, in turn, is making my emotions feel worse.
I'm not flashbacking and I'm not caught up in my past. I really can't discern what might be wrong other than I am going through a med adjustment for my neuro issues and my body is on the fritz. Grounding techniques aren't working and I already tried looking at my favorite funny videos but I felt a general sense of nothingness. No change. Indifference to it, I guess. I had a hysterectomy years ago so I know it's not a 'time of the month' issue or pregnancy so I am really at a loss here.
I could use help; to those of you who have anxiety what do you all do to help combat your anxiety when it comes along?
its a anti psychotic but its also sedative. i use a really high dose but in small doses it can be used for anxiety and irritability.
My anxiety is always making me jittery and I often hide in blankets, and like you, Alice, I'm not depressed or anything. I just can't find a refuge from the anxiety. It's just... Anxiety anxiety anxiety. I don't know what other neuro issues specifically you have (I've got epilepsy) but the bleeping meds for my epilepsy can cause mood problems, atop the PTSD.
The fact you've got a med adjustment is a red flag for me. I'd definitely call the doc about it. The emotional stuff is sometimes a few weeks of hell, and sometimes means th emed is not agreeing with you. I've done that. OMG. I was never so glad to see the back end of some meds in my *life* as I was the second epilepsy cocktail (my mid-twenties) and the Xanax a couple years ago (rebound anxiety when it wore off was worse than why I took the darn Xanax!)....
Negative anxiety is a good term for it, Alice. I get that with medical stuff to the point it's actually now blown into PTSD. Atop the other PTSD.
I've tried a lot of things:
Grounding
Artwork
Destroying something in a productive way (shredding papers, ripping up old boxes for the recycling bins, etc.)
Listing my "Worst Case Scenarios" about any and everything that might be a focus of anxiety.
forcing myself to do the relaxation breathing techniques even if I want to not do anything (like today, for example, ugh)
Gentle stretching and slow movement (yoga-tai chi style, tho' not those necessarily)
And just lately, I've goneback to an old one, from childhood. I sing along with a musical. I can't hold a tune with a clamp, but the singing focuses my brain on remembering the words, and I have to breathe, too, which is helpful.
No idea if that's useful, but I'm always seeking new answers, too.
Soft purring support, Alice. Oh, and funny videos? Only go so far for me, too. I can watch something that has me laughing out loud one day, anfd then? Pfft.
Oh, and I use aromatherapy. I learned how to do my own over time, b/c what makes other people relax can trigger me. Sometimes I'll dump herbs or spices into some simmering water on the stove if I don't have fancy oils. I pick things that I associate with calm good times. Lemon is a great one for me, which is weird to most, but when I was little, Mom and I made a lemon meringue pie together, and we ate it all ourselves, and nobody but us knew. Lemon (real lemon, not lemon verbena) takes me ot that happy place, and the aroma can help the rest of the stuff get me a little less anxious.
Sorry so long, and so sorry you're feeling that way. It *sux*.:-)
Leo, I took your advice and called my doctor. It turns out my sleeplessness last night and my extreme anxiety today was caused by the new medication I was placed on. My doctor had me immediately stop it, and being a dose behind now I am already starting to feel better. The anxiety (as a side effect) was impacting my neurological condition and I got less than two hours of sleep because of it which likely added to my emotional state today. My doctor said that because I had just recently started I should be feeling more like my "normal" self in a few days.
I feel better knowing what was causing the anxiety (because I was stressing that I couldn't figure out what was causing it) and having had PTSD for so long I couldn't see the forest through the trees. I was so concerned the anxiety might be PTSD related that I was racking my brain trying to figure it out, and it never occurred to me it could be as simple as a bad reaction to new medicine. Thank you. I can't express how good your advice was and how much I appreciate it.
I just had a very bad bout of it and had to shut down everything but my email.
Keep feeling better :)
I had been hospitalized for PTSD 3 times in my life before. Once as a teen, once in my 30s, once in my 40s. I had lost two major career job positions to PTSD, too. Then I collapsed in front of my new boss on my teaching job I in 2011 when my kidney disease came on. I ended up in the hospital then but didn't lose my new job--not quite. My new boss sent HR to ask if I needed to go on disability, but I hung on vowing to find substitutes for my medication that would let me keep working.
So it's a real question.
That's how it happened that meditation and affirmations, therapy and support group participation were no longer supplements to me. They were all there was. That, and joining up here at DS PTSD and coming here every day just like I used to take my meds every day.
I bought a little altar and bought books on meditation. I learned how. I had been a hospital chaplain before kidney disease, a career I lost because of it. Back then I had a prayer I used to say for my patients: "May I be filled with lovingkindness, may I be well, may I be peaceful and at ease, may I be happy. May I have mental happiness, may I have physical happiness, may I have ease of well being."
Now I said it for myself. Now I was the patient. I said it like I meant it.
I have managed for 5 years without meds because of that now. Last week I got freaked out by back to school meetings, though, and had a night of anxiety insomnia that people here helped me through. So I'm gathering more affirmations for next week when classes at the community college where I teach actually start.
That's why I started another thread like yours asking for the same thing--help with anxiety. But in my case specifically for affirmations, because that's the only medication left. It's worked for 5 years now, though, and that's not nothing. I haven't taken a sick day off of work for 2 and 1/2 years now, something I make sure my boss remembers by my reminding her every chance I get.
That's what's worked for me for a few years now, Alice. Whatever works for you, do that. There is no right or wrong answer, it's just what works.
I feel better knowing it was the medicine, and I am confident I will return to my "normal" in the next few days. I have managed to strike a fairly good balance in my mental health over the years; I had an upset two years ago where the flashbacks restarted and sought treatment for "survivor's guild/syndrome." Since then I've been working on letting the new memories go.
In all of this though, the anxiety was new to me. I do take medication for neurological reasons and that sometimes makes things complicated. I am not fortunate enough I would survive off of my medicines. I would be in a wheelchair, my muscles would pull themselves, and I would start having seizures. Even on my medication I managed to pull a muscle in my heart wall earlier this year.
It's a very fine/delicate balance for me, but I would like to think I manage it well. I reach out for mental help when I need it, but prefer not to take medicine for my PTSD. I am a big believer in CBT and it has worked very well for me. Sometimes I just need to brush up on my grounding techniques and hit the ground running again.
I have found comfort in talking and sorting here. I am a lurker; I read pretty much all the threads even if I don't comment on them. Weirdly, it helps me feel less alone and I benefit from that. My PTSD stems from human trafficking (among other things) and it can be hard for me to talk about it to the people close to me because their face scrunches and they typically apologize that it happened to me. I'm funny; I refuse to feel sorry for myself and I don't want people to feel sorry for me either. I also don't want people to look at me and say "Oh, you have done so much for someone who has been through xyz" ... No. I have done so much for any one person because I'm awesome (or at least my husband says so, haha).
I guess I said that just to say while I still need DS, you all help me immensely whether you know it or not. I was able to come to the board today and talk about being a hot mess, dealing tearey eyed with anxiety for no reason (that I could think of) and not one person put me down. Instead, you all tried to help me figure out how to handle it, and I appreciate that.
I appreciate all of you in more ways that I can express. I know I can be blunt and I lack tact which sometimes makes me come across as brash (it's an area of myself I am currently working on), but just in case I don't say it; I don't judge any of you, and I appreciate that you don't judge me.
Also, Mujica -- I am not sure I have affirmations that would help in your unique situation, but I'd be happy to look around and see if I have anything that might apply. I also think it's fantastic that you manage to lead your life without medication. Your story is impressive and I aspire to be more like you in that regard. :)
Purring hugs!