Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
a group I’m in meets weekly. Tonight we started a new lesson, on boundaries. It was hard to talk about. I did little talking. I have grown comfortable setting my own boundaries but even this week I realized I’m not as assertive as I would like to be.
But I am assertive and it’s not always taken well. In fact it’s rarely take kindly. I have one of those really sweet sounding voices and I keep my cool. I’m respectful. Sometimes people just don’t like the message.
I heard a lot of phrases my Dad used to say:
because I said so
do as I say not as I do
no ifs ands or buts
if you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at all
Rigid boundaries for children can create a lot of problems. Me. I’m problems. But not just because dads boundaries were rigid but because Moms were nonexistent. It’s like she wanted to be our buddy but she also didn’t want anything to do with me
My counselor explained some things that has me believing there was no attachment with my parents. I sought my moms attention and time and love and more than anything her acceptance, until after I miscarried four years ago when again I found her in the category of people who should have done more or accepted my feelings.
Parents are so hard. Boundaries with parents are so hard. So now I’m terrified. To be a parent. How will I know if she’s attached. I think she is but I wonder if my parents think I was...or if they’d blame me. I still hear how awful I was as a newborn for crying so hard because I wanted to be laid down to sleep. My brother was the opposite. He wanted to be held. It took mom two weeks to figure me out. And it about killed her.
A lot of overwhelming feelings and fears
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
On the one hand, the psychologist told me I was in, I was going to get the residency position because I had a "well-defended ago." In other words, I had boundaries. I asked, how about character flaws? She said, "yes, you have a well-defended ego." I said, "Wait, you just said that." She said, "Right. What's good at work sometimes isn't good at home."
She was so right. Being raised in abuse and war as a kid, I learned to protect myself. Good for me. But I learned to protect myself. Divorce for me, too.
If you feel like keeping us updated on what you're learning from your group, I know that I, for one, could really benefit. When to hold 'em and when to fold 'em is still a really big learning process for me re boundaries.
You can always write questions that you may have down and when you're comfortable bring them up for discussion.....xo