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Not quite sure what to say here. Dd15 has been on anti-depressants since October. They seemed to help, but it was hard to tell in some ways as lots of other things changed, some for the better, some for the worse. Relationships on the home front have improved, particularly her relationship with me (I had some issues that needed to shift). Dd now has lots of new stresses in her life which I'm sure are affecting her ability to cope with life and she has again been talking about and we think attempted suicide (she has told some people, including a teacher that she attempted suicide recently).
My concern now is that I know that anti-depressants can increase the risk of suicide in adolescents and her meds have just been increased. Has anyone had experience with this and come out the other end? It just adds more stress into the mix for me. She is already in a fragile enough state with severe ptsd from her sexual abuse. I know that I need to be vigilant, but don't want to confront her. She certainly doesn't talk to us about thinking this way but has obviously spoken with people outside of the family, including her counsellor, a teacher and at least one friend. It was the school which made us aware of how bad things really were.
For now dd is in a better space. She fell asleep in my arms last night, the first time in ages. I savour the moments and appreciate the fact that I have her to hug as I'm so scared of losing her. I've recently made the decision to never see our son again, so I am grieving the loss of that relationship. Don't want to lose another child to this whole mess.
My concern now is that I know that anti-depressants can increase the risk of suicide in adolescents and her meds have just been increased. Has anyone had experience with this and come out the other end? It just adds more stress into the mix for me. She is already in a fragile enough state with severe ptsd from her sexual abuse. I know that I need to be vigilant, but don't want to confront her. She certainly doesn't talk to us about thinking this way but has obviously spoken with people outside of the family, including her counsellor, a teacher and at least one friend. It was the school which made us aware of how bad things really were.
For now dd is in a better space. She fell asleep in my arms last night, the first time in ages. I savour the moments and appreciate the fact that I have her to hug as I'm so scared of losing her. I've recently made the decision to never see our son again, so I am grieving the loss of that relationship. Don't want to lose another child to this whole mess.
Second of all, the "risk" depends on a lot of other factors. When I was placed on anti-depressants the first thing I asked aws about that risk because I frankly do not want to die and don't want som emedication making that choice for me, so to speak. My psychiatrist explained that in his experience, patients on ADs who had suicidal ideation said it felt like the thoughts were not really their own---which may only be true of my AD.
Talk to her prescribing doc about that risk, about what signs and symptoms might indicate teh med is enhancing any underlying risk.
That said, I first thought about suicide at 11, tried it in myt wenties and failed, and promised a few years ago to my huby that unless I am dx'd with something that takes away my personhood (like Alzheimer's) I will *not* do it. ADs weren't around in any of those cases. Just the trauma can do it. That helplessness.
In my experience, it was not that I longed to die. I just didn't know what else would stop the pain. Continue to be supportive, make sure her treating therapists/docs know the situation, and keep holding her whenever you can. And be sure you're getting care for *you* on the issues within the family---so you can heal, too.
Gentle purrs,
Leo
This must just be terrifying. I can't really imagine.....
AD and suicidality is a very complicated and controversial subject. It's hard to 'do' good science around the issue -- far too many confounding variables.
So let's put that part (the drug connection) aside for a moment.
If you have reason to believe that your daughter may be suicidal ... sadly ... my gut tells me it's time to go back to any/all your resources, and tell them exactly that -- you're worried that your daughter may be suicidal, and ... here's why.
It's hugely tough, as a parent, to know when to act and when to just breathe.
It's hugely tough when you are a human being with (C)PTSD.
When you're a parent AND you have (C)PTSD, it's unbelievably difficult.
But I feel like ... this is a pretty critical situation, and it's worth a call to her providers, INCLUDING the doc who prescribed the anti-depressants.
If the meds DO have anything to do with it, then it's the prescribing physician's responsibility to assess the situation.
But whether meds do or do NOT have a part in this, the situation warrants pretty prompt evaluation.
I'm so sorry.
I wish you both/all peace, health, and strength.
We have a referral to a psychiatrist I have heard nothing but praise about, but that is going to take a while to get into. For now I am just trying to be as supportive as I can. We don't talk about issues unless dd raises them. I feel that it's got to be her lead and her choice. She knows that I am really struggling too (it's hard to keep this hidden from those around you and I've never been good at hiding my emotions- wish I could, but I can't). This only makes me feel as though I'm adding to her problems, which is the last thing I want to do.
Will certainly keep an eye out for any increased withdrawal and other indicators. In the meantime a pharmacist might be a good person for me to talk this through with as they understand meds better than most doctors.