i feel that way like every other day it seems like. I wish it wasnt like that or i knew someway of making it go away. Ive found this site and the people ive met to always bring me up when i post no always but most of the time. But im here if you need me

Don't feel, then. It's ok; we dissociate when it's too much. You can come back to feeling when you're strong enough to another day. There's a great site online by a woman who struggles with PTSD and dissociates. She made a list of 10 things she wants people out there to know. Here's #1:

"This is what I want the people out there affected by PTSD and dissociation to know:

1. It is OK to let dissociation win sometimes.

Your brain needs a rest from the pain of living with trauma. It takes time to learn new coping skills. In the meantime, do what you need to stay safe and keep practicing. You will get there."
https://themighty.com/2016/08/what-people-who-have-ptsd-and-dissociation-should-know/

So take it from her; don't feel today. We're here for you no matter what.