Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group

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almost caused a fight at the drug store

Tryna_B_Better
Tryna_B_Better

My mom was trying to show me a photo of something that has caused me serious trauma since about 2003


while we were in the middle of cvs and i politely asked her to stop and kindly and gently pushed it away,


but she kept shoving it in my face and trying to make the point that it was ok b/c it was my mom who was


doing it.  i mean, i don't want to put out there exactly what it was in the photo but it's something that 


has literally haunted me for almost 20 years and she thought it was funny as hell to keep forcing it within


my view.  it caused a huge issue between us and almost some sort of physical confrontation.



now that ive been reminded of it the image keeps popping back up in my mind anyways, its making it hard 


to sleep and it has stressed our relationship.  why do people have to be that way?  and why am i the bad guy for


it when i was very polite and nice about it for the first fifteen times i pushed it away even though she suffers from


some serious mental illness herself so she really should understand from where im coming.



anyways, just wanted to get that off my chest.

doggy123
doggy123
wow, that sucks. I had an incident w/my crazy mom at walmart, lol. the clerks did not seem to enjoy it.
Beryl367
Beryl367
Sorry you had that situation. That sounds really tough. Glad you got through it.
Community LeaderLeo
Leo
At a guess? Your mom wants you to say it wasn't that bad so she can stop feeling anything abou tthe incident ---- "See, see, you aren't dead, so it must be okay!" logic. That's just my guess ----- and sincere support. I get that from people. Even a therapist. "Your dad just looks like a regular guy in that photo". Well, duh. He wasn't photographed while hurting his kids! *sigh*
Thor2008
Thor2008
Sorry for the situation. It was a major trigger and I avoid those so I don't flip out in a store or something. Your mom should have known better.
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
Leo might be right.... It might be her guilt??? possibly or lighten what she's feeling about what's happened to you

This isn't the first time of late that your mom has been pushing your buttons... I know things are rough right now .. When you're able to it might be best that you rent somewhere else... Even if it's just a room.... It might be healthier for you

I'm sorry that she acted like this... Maybe when things are calm it might be good to sit down and say how you feel about things that have happened to you

If she won't listen with respect I wouldn't blow up.... Maybe take a walk or leave for a short while

This would be upsetting for sure..... Big hug..... xo
Community Leadermujicaptsd
mujicaptsd
Thor's, right, Tryna, your mom should've known better. Unfortunately, it sounds like your mom's kind of like my mom. She did the same sort of thing. I think Leo's right here, too, about what's behind this sort of behavior--it's for their own sake, it's not really about you or me. So drawing a boundary for ourselves in these situations makes good sense.
Tryna_B_Better
Tryna_B_Better
actually the photo wasnt something that she had anything to do with. she was in no way related to the trauma so, i mean, thank you guys for that thought, sincerely, but that really isnt even part of it. it was something from my younger days that was 100% personal and she probably didnt know about it, but when i first said "i dont want to see that, its traumatic for me" she should have stopped. and to Suncloud, we don't live together, we're just spending time together to make up for the last 8.5 years i was away, she's ok most of the time, this particular situation was just messed up.

thank you guys all for the thoughts , i really do appreciate it. any outside perspective can be helpful
Community Leadermujicaptsd
mujicaptsd
Hmm, it seemed like it would have been some trauma to which she was related, tryna, that's the possibility that first came to mind. Good to know that's not it, that it's something else. Still, it seems if you were clear that "I don't want to see that, it's traumatic for me" then indeed she should have stopped, as you say. You drew a boundary clearly by saying what you said word for word. so I'd stick to your approach if I were you.
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