Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
When i was 11 years old, my grandfather passed away. I was really close with him. I heard his last breath. I went in there after he had passed away and i saw him laying there with his eyes and mouth open and he was kind of arched back. I remember running out of the room crying, i remember running to my bed and laying down and crying some more. I remember crying myself to sleep that night.
A week before he passed away he called my mom on the other phone line and told her that he thought he was dying. he said to her, " Holly (my mom's name) I think i died, i think im dying." And i think i picked that up from him because when i feel weird or something doesn't feel right with me i always say, I think im dying... the day of the night he died, he was so confused and out of it. He was reaching for the ceiling and saying, "God take me" over and over and i remember running to go get my mom....
I think his death traumatized me and i never fully got over it. Im 22 years old now and i always think im going to die or im dying. I have all these fears of things that can kill me instantly and i think its because his death traumatized me a lot.
Like right now my main fear is having a stroke, and about 10 minuets ago i suddenly got confused and thought i was having a stroke because of it even though i've had this fear for a month and am always feeling confused. I think im so confused though because the past 4 days all i can think about is my grandfather's passing.
I don't know what to do. I keep crying and i cant help it. I miss him so much. And i think his death is the reason i have so much anxiety about death in general. I dont know what to do. I dont want to cry anymore over it. Im lost.
Does anyone have any advice for me on how to deal with this? Does you guys think this is the reason why i fear that im having a stroke or dying all the time? I'm sorry this was so long and i hope this made sense to everyone. I'm sorry if i kind of rambled on, im just struggling right now . :'(
A week before he passed away he called my mom on the other phone line and told her that he thought he was dying. he said to her, " Holly (my mom's name) I think i died, i think im dying." And i think i picked that up from him because when i feel weird or something doesn't feel right with me i always say, I think im dying... the day of the night he died, he was so confused and out of it. He was reaching for the ceiling and saying, "God take me" over and over and i remember running to go get my mom....
I think his death traumatized me and i never fully got over it. Im 22 years old now and i always think im going to die or im dying. I have all these fears of things that can kill me instantly and i think its because his death traumatized me a lot.
Like right now my main fear is having a stroke, and about 10 minuets ago i suddenly got confused and thought i was having a stroke because of it even though i've had this fear for a month and am always feeling confused. I think im so confused though because the past 4 days all i can think about is my grandfather's passing.
I don't know what to do. I keep crying and i cant help it. I miss him so much. And i think his death is the reason i have so much anxiety about death in general. I dont know what to do. I dont want to cry anymore over it. Im lost.
Does anyone have any advice for me on how to deal with this? Does you guys think this is the reason why i fear that im having a stroke or dying all the time? I'm sorry this was so long and i hope this made sense to everyone. I'm sorry if i kind of rambled on, im just struggling right now . :'(
Best wishes on your road to recovery, and welcome to the group.
It's perfectly normal to be afraid of dying. The people who climb cliffs without climbing gear are the ones who are messed up. Don't be ashamed of what you are feeling, your first experience of death is bound to be very unsettling. Your reaction to it is just your being human.
Give yourself time, it will pass.
i know that for myself i had strange fears, fears i never had so strong;y when my ptsd was high. just like death, im having a heary attack...
at first i was sure it had to do with some past truama. it HAD to be, if it was not a reaction to a specific trauma in my head (then) i would have been crazy. Now i know that that fear had little to do with a traumatic experience with death but awas an overal anxiety reaction of the many i had.
that was my experience, urs can diffidently be from urs with ur grandfathers death, only you can tell.
Hugs!!