In 2005, i was diagnosed with cancer in my leg and had to have a large chunk of my upper leg removed then, 18 months later, i went to the emergency room having a lot of back pain. What they found was cancer. A month later I had to have a total hysterectomy(at only 34!!) I also had part of my colon and a bunch of tumor removed. Six months later i was split open again had my omentum removed and had the type of chemo where they put hot chemo inyour open abdominal cavity for two hours. Six months after that, i had to have a hernia reair in my original surgery scar. during the hernia surgery The anesthesiologist cut my gums down to the bone while putting me under.

Ihave no family support. Everytime i get pain that doesn't go away, i freak out. I have gone to the emergency room more times than i can count. Something drives me there and i don't know what it is? I am not a drug seeker. I have three bottles of pain meds that are out of date because i've never touched them. I know it's not drama because i go there alone every single time. I know i have ptsd becuz i relive that night in the er when they found my second cancer over and over in my head. All i ever think about is how im going to die, when im going to die, etc and to top it off i have several other medical problems that are all very hard to deal with. I just feel overwhelmed mentally and physically. I don't know what my problem is. I just don't know where to turn. I wonder why i keep going to the er? Any thoughts or advice?