Sean, I totally understand. I too have an inner child. She is the one that comes out when I disassociate. She panics and says "help me, help me." When people say to me "Ssh It's o.k." I answer back "No, it's NOT o.k." I don't remember any of this upon coming back to my core self. I think you'd be surprised how many people with PTSD and who have been abused as children, never truly grow-up.

Much love,
Clair

Sorry to hear that sean.

Trauma is stored at the time it happens with the tools to battle it at that age. So thinking you never grew up in ways in kind of accurate.

This will change when you integrate all this trauma into current time with your coping skills now.

I was abused by a critical narcississtic father. Nothing sexual but violence and total negativity. It took time and I had my childhood come back into my life like never before.

Most of this has healed now with work and therapy.

All you have is the you that is here now. All you can do is do the best with who you are now. The past is not right or wrong or good or bad, it just is. The only thing we all have is the current moment.

We can not change the past. We can change everything about how we live now. It takes time but you can heal from this.

Good Luck. This is a hard disorder.

Yeah it does, i do notice adults who were abused as children, have a childlike 'something' about them for the rest of their lives, i find it very cute.......I mean is horrible what happens that we stay that way, but is a charming sort of thing......There's a part of us that is forever a child.

Hi Sean Marsh,
Please try and look in on the Multiple Personality site -- there are a lot of us talking about alters on that site. It is confusing to be divided into more than one person. It's called (now days - DID).

I think you will feel right at home. Lots of real nice people who have gone through their own personal trials to cause them to split off into various personalities.

((( Love and Hugs )))
Midnight Shadow -- or just Shadow -- or even MS