Post Partum Depression Support Group

Postpartum depression (also postnatal depression) is a form of major depression which can affect women, and less frequently men, after childbirth. It is widely considered to be treatable. Studies report prevalence rates from 5% to 25%, but methodological differences among the studies make the actual prevalence rate unclear.

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Mental Health
/ Post Partum Depression Support Group

PPD- Leaving my family

law32
law32
I'm 6 weeks postpartum. I've been in therapy for a couple weeks. I'm unable to care for my newborn son. I'm actually a terrible mother, and my son deserves better. I'm also a terrible wife. My husband has been getting very frustrated with me, and I can't blame him. I get angry at him without any warning. I resent him a great deal- I'm at home all day with my son while he is at work. I am highly educated (an attorney) and have had jobs that make me feel important. Now, I feel like a failure. So, I've decided to leave my family. They deserve better. I'm going to ask my husband for a divorce. I've decided that I will give him sole custody of my son, and I will forego visitation rights. I am going to draft a contract that states just that and file for a dissolution of marriage. It is either this or ending my life. I don't want to die, so divorce is the only option. Like I said, my family deserves better. As I write this, my son is crying and my husband is comforting him. I am completely worthless.
slovak1924
slovak1924
Hi Law32. Please hang in there. New motherhood is tough. It can be a jarring experience and unfortunately our society sometimes glosses over the challenges and how difficult of a life change it can be. I am a therapist but a mother too and I remember having some of those thoughts you are sharing. Things will get better but I would hold off on any major decisions due to the possibility of post partum depression which can cloud someone's thinking. Give therapy some time. Post Partum depression is very treatable. I've seen it with myself and with many, many clients.
iam30113
iam30113
Take some time before you do that, see how you feel when the PPD is under control and try not to make any permanent decisions to 'solve' what might be a temporary issue. You can get better, just hang in there a while longer. If needs be maybe you might need to be away for a short while, get some breathing space. Talk to your therapist and try to come up with a solution.
flawed1
flawed1
While I can't say that I know how you feel, I can relate. I recently had an episode with my husband where I just wanted to walk out of the house and not come back. Thankfully, he stopped me.

We do those things thinking we are being selfless and loving because our families deserve better. It's a flawed thought, but one made with love.

If we love our families so deeply, we can't be completely hopeless. Right?

I think that is what I will take away from this experience, today... I may not feel happiness, but I do have the capability to love. Glass half-full.

Thank you.
juniper23
juniper23
I'm no expert. I'm actually not much of an expert in anything except screwing things up myself. I agree with everyone on here though... separate and take some time to reset. I think I get how you feel about the whole worthless part. I def do understand the stay at home and all the other feelings that come with it. My husband is actually asleep in our beautiful big bed while I live down here in the living room with my 4 weeks old. I also am not natural to motherhood and this surprised me. I also have been flipping out on my husband. I have thought of running away. I think time is our best friend always. Please take some time first. Go away for a little bit....
MADgirl77
MADgirl77
I know a great family who would love that little boy and bring him up well ijs
newmom17
newmom17
I know it's been a long time since this post, I just wanted to check in and see how are you feeling today. How are things? Did things get better? When we are in the "heat of the moment" and feeling hopeless and anxious and sad all the time, unfortunately we don't see a way out. But PPD is treatable and you can go back to feeling like yourself again. You just have to admit you have a problem and most important, seek for help. It is tough to get out of it by yourself. Talk about it, talk about it to people who you care about and care about you. Talk to your mom, your sister, your brother, your best friend and your husband. More people can relate than you think. You are not alone in this. And I hope you did got better. Please, let us know. Sending you love and strength.