Polyamory Community Group
A place to discuss living a polyamorous lifestyle - the joys, the challenges and everything in between. Polyamory (a hybrid word -poly is Greek for many and amor is Latin for love - coined by among others Neopagan poet, author, lecturer, and priestess Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart) means "The practice, state or ability of having more than one sexual loving relationship at...
Hi guys! I've been in a polyamorous relationship for almost 4 months now. I've also recently separated from my husband who was also practicing polyamory with me. I had slight jealously issues with polyamory before, but it was manageable. Now I get really bad anxiety about my partner leaving me. It doesn't help that they are also going through something at the moment and have not replied to any of my messages since I saw them last Saturday and it's Thursday now. There has been a day or so here or there that they haven't messaged me, but it's never been this long. Do you guys have any ideas on ways that my partner and I can both get what we need if they need space, but I need attention and to know they care?
There have also been instances where I've needed my partner's support, but they've been with their other partner and abruptly stopped messaging me back which I didn't like at all. Is this how things normally are, or is there a different way to go about things like that?
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
So assuming that there's nothing preventing the others in your relationship from communicating with you, you're being excluded — which isn't polyamory.
NOTE: The lack of agreement in the polyamory community about what exactly polyamory is, frequently leads to these kinds of problems. It's often conflated with swinging and used as an excuse for cheating when one partner gets caught. The easiest way to solve this problem is for everyone to get on the same page with exactly what type of relationship you are in.
I had to sift through all this for a few months to get it figured out from an objective and historical perspective. So it's not simply my "opinion". Polyamory is not whatever anyone wants it to be so long as it suits them — and it's a definite red flag when you encounter that attitude.