Unfortunately an all to common occurance. The neighbours are probably shocked and thinking why they didnt know this about him...I can hear the " But he was such a nice guy" statements already...
Very sad. I feel for her, and her friends and family...what a horrible thing.

People think it won't happen to them, i read your replies and i think you are right on T.....

Abd sadly the ones that end up paying the price are the children at the end.

Ilene, I love the advice you give. It's too easy for all of us (myself a big culprit) to deny or avoid the seriousness and the consequences of what is really happening.

When I was in my abusive situation my psychologist warned me that his threats and abusive actions would escalate. I thought she was just being dramatic, but when things did escalate and followed the very pattern of behavior that she had promised would happen, it was chilling. At that point I finally accepted that it wasn't just a "good guess" on her part; his behavior was textbook.

Emotions have a way of blurring reality. So a well timed reality check is necessary and appreciated.

My prayers go out to the family, it is a sad situation. Yes, I follow a lot of posts on here, and so many gifted with giving advice. It is nice to have a breath of fresh air from the abuser's words. I am sorry this woman had to die, and they usually look at the one's closest to her. Also, I learned in college, it is usually a brutal murder.

Ilene I don't think you're an alarmist, but more a mentor to us here. I too hear on the news at my little city in Ontario stories of men who killed their wives, children and themselves. It is sickening and reprehensible.

I am so sorry about that lady and I thank you for letting us know. I will say more prayers this evening for the women who have died at the hands of their spouses and for my own safety and thank God for having you in my life. Thanks for being a great friend.

Linda :)

Yep, like LadyRowen, I can hear the neighbours. I can also hear her thinking "it's really not that bad, it's not like he'd ever REALLY hurt me, he loves me, he's just got problems. If I show him how much I love him too, it will be better".

its so hard to believe because you see them as a lover who is misguided when they hurt you mentally or physically, who is even right! or, going to change! or, repentent! or, unhappy! or, abused themselves in the past! or, ery very sorry! or, amazing apart from when they're hurting us!

none of it stands up though. none of it.

Ilene...I think that it's good to be an alarmist, when a situationis alarming! And you just keep on being that one who always says, GET OUT OF THERE. YOUR LIFE IS IN DANGER.

People can't always see it within a relationship But outside, observing, with knowledge, and experience...maybe a life can be saved....

What you do here in invaluable. In a calm clear voice you say what needs to be said...Many hugs to you....

Agreeing with all of y'all...a sad story.

This breaks my heart. Were there children involved? I think we should all wear a purple ribbon to remember her by.

Tame ---- The missing (murdered?) woman has two young children:

Cynthia Cannons two children are nine-year-old Elizabeth Cusack and five-year-old Patrick Cannon, Jr.

Apparently, Elizabeth was from a prior marriage and the child she had with Patrick Cannon sadly now carries the abuser's given name and is a "Jr."

Phil McGraw was on one of the morning news programs today. He reported some statistics. He said that three women die in the U.S. every day at the hands of an abuser.

He said that emotional intimidation, manipulation and control nearly always preceeds battery and murder.

He should have said that breaking away from abuse (Cynthia was divorcing her husband), are the times when fatal abuse is most common.

He also said that for females between ages fifteen and forty-four, injury at the hands of a date or intimate partner is the most common form of injury.

Yes, please send your prayers of healing to Cynthia's two young children.

Based on evidence the local police collected, which included a trail of blood from the livingroom couch outside, a bloody sleeping bag, (Cynthia was a girl scout leader), his failing to report his missing wife for nearly four days, and a trail leading to a local river, it's unlikely that Cynthia is alive. As of a few hours ago, no body has been recovered. Patrick Cannon is being held on millions of dollars bail.

And yes -------- over and over you'll hear neighbors of these tragedies saying: We had no clue. They were a quiet couple.

And yes ----- over and over I hear (and we all read here), victims diminishing the abuse with various excuses for the abusers. . . . . . . he's not bad ALL the time. . . . . there's got to be some good in her, I know there's some good in her (I heard this one last night!). . . . . he only rages when he's drunk. . . . . . . she had a tough childhood, I just want to get her help. . . . . and on and on.

That's why I take the approach I do.

The lives of these two children, Elizabeth and Patrick ----- are impacted now in ways that we can't begin to articulate. Unless there's some world-class intervention brought to bear, this impact will in all likelihood, come to define who they are for the rest of their lives.

And Cynthia was only one of the three women killed on that day.

I don't think you're an alarmist....just a realist.

THANK YOU Ilene for being the awesome person that you are......I agree, you are not an alarmist, but a person who sees the truth that some, myself included, sometimes don't want to see..........until now. I know I have said the same things, he can change, he's not that bad, I don't believe he would ever physically hurt me, but as time has gone on, and seen him escalate in ways in never believed he would, I realize that, that article could be me, it could be any of us......and I pray every day that one more life is spared. One more child doesn't have to bear witness to these horrific nightmares. I am crying as I write this, because........it could be me...........

God bless and keep you all safe

This is so sad... and these stories are heard too often.

Ilene - I would like to thank you for the words of wisdom you post. I always look forward to reading what you have to say about everyone's situations. You are not an alarmist.... you are the voice in everyone's head that they usually ignore but should listen to!

Thank you for allaying my fears that I'm over-dramatic in my responses.

At this moment, Wednesday noon (approaching a week since the last siting of Cynthia Cannon), no living person nor deceased body, has surfaced. But more disturbing pieces, keep turning up around her home ----- her car, her wallet, things with blood on them. . . . . .

The police believe that her soon-to-be-ex husband killed her. He's being held on three million dollars bail.

Meanwhile, a couple days after Cynthia went missing), another woman in Connecticut was shot dead, (along with two other people). One news station reported the alleged shooter was a former boyfriend.

The police are back to investigating inside the Cannon home, which now may be sitting empty ----- with one parent dead, another in jail and the children in the custody of family members.

The thing about something like this is that for years, often decades, there was a documentable trail of emotional abuse perpetrated by the (alleged) murderer. Once convicted, the case goes down in the books as physical violence. But for most of its history, it was EMOTIONAL violence ----- to which almost NOBODY PAYS ATTENTION.

If anybody did, there might not be one innocent soul murdered and two children left motherless, orphaned by their own father.

Let's STOP IGNORING EMOTIONAL ABUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!