I am having a hard time just letting go and getting out of this mess completely. I have taken so many steps to breaking away, but still there are things that I know that I need to do to get this behind me and I continue to drag my feet and become weak when it comes to him. I dont know if it is because I have a child with him or what? But I continue to want to help him~ even when he is dragging me down with him, even when he is just using me for my weaknesses. He knows that i am a softy or a sucker or dumbass~ whatever you may call it and I know too, but out of force of habit or SOMETHING (some weakness) I "bow" down to his needs and enable him to be a jack ass and to not really ever take responsibility for his actions. I came to the point where i dont think that he is capable of taking care of himself because of his alcoholism and so I let him drag me down in the pits with him so that he is always going to mess up my future and what i want in my life that i will NEVER have with him cause he keeps dragging me down. This is so hard, because i hate to see him drown, i have always tried to keep him afloat with me~ but the more time that goes by, the more time is wasted on my life and my childrens and the more opportunities seem to pass by because of him. How do I move on without caring what he is going through and to let karma do its thing and let him suffer his consequences of the physical and emotional abuse that he has given to others???????? I was being so strong, but as time went on it all caught up with me......
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question,why is there a pattern to this?It seems that abusive men rush into a relationship full speed sweeping you off your feet,they never move slow and the come on with talking marriage etc,ive noticed this pattern and wonder why they say in books etc that this is a red flag,,does anyone know why this is?