Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Worked yesterday despite fighting the flu and a migraine. Have not taken a sick day since, well I can't even remember. I only go to my dr when I have to in order to refill meds and try to cover any problems I am having then. Even though I was sick, I made it a point to go get a birthday card for my nephew and get some cash from the ATM to put in to drop off at the motel where my younger brother was having a pool party for him. They have either these, skating or bowling every year. He is 8. I think its nice they do this but they pay for everything and so many people and kids come and don't bring a gift or card. Meanwhile I am giving them money left and right and I am home every weekend or working. I stayed long enough to get a hug from my nephew, visit a bit while they ate their pizza, then as I was chilling and achey I left. I told them I was likely going to rest that night and tomm. Well my SIL wanted me to go to nephews BB game. Not only was I not feeling good, I don't do crowds well. She knows this but ignores it. I am now waiting for the guilt trip that she always gives. I really wish extroverted people who have married their childhood sweetheart, have a supportive family, kids and no idea what physical, emotional or sexual abuse is, could cut me some slack. Sorry if this comes across harsh but sometimes I feel like a doormat. :(
You have every right to take care of yourself and you don't owe her a reason or an excuse to do so. I hope you take good care of you!!
~ big healing hugs & hoping you feel better soon ~
I have a SIL just like yours. Picture perfect life with little to no clue what a bad relationship can look like. Keep that in the back of your mind when dealing with her. I know its tough though.
Hang in there sweetie!
You do not have to be a doormat and anyone that wants you to be shouldn't have the privilege of being in your life. You have so much to give of your heart that it is a shame to waste it on those who don't see the value in a relationship of give and take with you.
Your value does not lie in being available for others to dump on you and carry other's burdens. Its one thing to help someone who benefits by receiving your care and generosity, its another when those who take what they are very capable of getting for themselves.
I'm sorry that you have these people in your life who don't see your value as a person...not just in what you can do for them. The fact they don't see it is on THEM not on you. You are not an ATM. Before you give out loans, make note of their credit score! Those with a history of not paying back and working the system aren't extended the privilege of a loan!! :-)
You can try to help them to understand with one on one talks but that's if you feel up to it. I think you were very nice to visit your nephew. If that was a fun experience just try to focus on that.
You aren't a doormat ad you sharing this with us proves that. You know you deserve better.
My SIL was a bit bossy and could patronise me in some pretty grating ways. She didn't have it made like yours, but she did treat her husband like a doormat.
They just don't get it and never will. And to call you like that so late on and ask if you still needed something that you had clearly asked her to get?? Please.
She could indeed cut you a great deal of slack, but it would appear she doesn't know how to... grrr!!
So sorry you had such a rough time, but I am sure your animals appreciated the company you lavished on them!
(((HUGS))) and don't pay the slightest attention to oblivious SIL xxx