I'm sorry Radrm. I feel the same way wanting to check facebook to see what he's up to, etc. I wonder what he's doing, what he's feeling, etc. BLAH. It sucks. I'm in week 4 of no contact. I'm sorry I can't offer much advice, just wanted you to know you're not alone in thinking and feeling this way. Maybe try to find a hobby you enjoy. Mayeb take up yoga. :)

((hugs))

Thanks I thought about trying yoga before but I have terrible arthritis in my hip, knee, and spine and to even do stretching i get inflammed and stuff but I do walk on the treadmill slowly on a daily basis. I barely have movement in my left hip. I did think about it because they offer it at my healthcare facility. I think I have enough to do but I just have to find friends somehow and get social interaction. I hope I make it to 4 weeks like you with no contact. I resisted the temptation to look on twitter so far!! Went out and pet my dogs instead and watered my trees. Now off to shower and get ready for my much needed psyciatrist appt! I wish they could find a med I dont react to.

I know this is a very difficult time for you. I'm in the same boat. As hard as it is I force myself to get out of the house. I know its lonely. I had no friends left either with the exception of one. She is generally busy. So at times I go out for a bite to eat and a glass of wine by myself. I'm pretty friendly so I always end up talking to someone. I know some people can't do that. I find it easy since I traveled for a living and had to eat. Is that something you can do? Maybe look at a hobby where people share the same interests as you? There are also meet up groups for just about everything these days. Hiking..walks, etc. Maybe your first step can be doing something like that and rebuild life again.
Each day gets a little easier when I don't feel so lonely and I have stuff to look forward to.

I've been thinking the same to myself that your title says, it's been 9 weeks now, I'm getting better at it though so all I can say is it will ease.

I've just acepted at as part of a process. And I let myself off for it. Over the last 9 weeks I've checked on fb on his daughters accounts and to be honest I've done this twice and both times it's set me back so please take it from my experience to NOT check up on anything to do with him! Just keep that attidue because its a good one to have and you may not see it yet but u are really helping yourself with your thoughts on the matter!

As far as friends well I know what u mean, I've found out who my friends are lately and now that I'm a bit further into no contact than u are I can say that I enjoy my own company, it's very healing because it gives u the space u needed to process without influence from people who don't really understand!

I got some frustrating advice off a friend at the beginning whom now I distance myself from as she also set me back.

It was the case of if it was here she wouldn't let a man do that to her blar blar and that I was thinking about it too much and that I needed to stop going over it in my head, u know like it was that easy!

All I can say is that this friend has not had any difficult issues to deal with in her life that are on the same level as what I've been throu, I've known her for 26 years so I know her life experiences and she's got a lovely husband, I nice house, money, two well behaved kids, she goes out a lot so she has a fantastic social life because her husband will do anything for her, even if he works all day he will stay in at the weekends and she goes out drinking with friends so in my opinion she's never had to experience trauma at all.

So all I can say is that friends sometimes can set u back so it's far better to talk to all if us on here who totally understand what your going through!

I left almost 6 months ago. The beginning was to say the least terrible. He would call me just to be mean all the time. I recently started no contact it has been easy because he hasnt tried to contact me but I find myself thinking what he is doing or who he is with. I have to tell myself.....I did the right thing and he will abuse again. I may be upset now but Im not near as upset as I would be still living in such an awful situation.

I checked our joint bank account numerous times a day and tried to analyze all of his purchases. It was such a set back for me. Even if I was having a great day and feeling good about myself as soon as i would open it it was like I was hit by a truck.

Stay strong and dont give him anymore of your time or energy try to cut him out of your life completely. Let that be a goal and work toward it. I just tell myself I have to make it through the next 10 min without thinking about him and then when the 10 min is up...I start over.

You are not ''stupid'' or'' desperate''.Your feelings are ''normal'' after being in a violent relationship. But, bad habits are hard to break. Him leaving was the best thing that could of happened to you, even though, you do not see it now...it's still fresh. An abuser never changes, never. Stop staying home, waiting for the phone to ring. Take a class, get a hobby, read self help books, volunteer someplace, make friends. You deserve to be treated with respect. Those vial verbal abusive words can linger in your soul if you let them, do not give in to this. I don't care if he hit you once or twice, he is going to do it again, his abuse will become worse if you let him come back. I am speaking from my own personal experiences. You are stonger than you think you are! Get busy and find out who you are, start having boundries with people. When we start to gain self esteem, then we will not let anyone abuse us again. You are going to therapy, that's a great start. Stay on this site, people on here are awesome! I hope you feel better soon. Time does heal....

Wow so much support on here! Thank you all. It helps me to stay strong and not give in to those stupid urges to check on him through the daughters twitter. I went to my appt today and it didn't go quite how I expected so I have to wait on counseling and stuff but I am going to listen to all of you and not give in to these thoughts and really keep myself occupied and hope I do OK. I am scared if he tries to contact me how will I handle it? Will I just delete his text? Will I give in and talk to him like all the other times? Will I be strong enough. What will I do when I get the anxiety if he does now? My doc took my meds away today and I dont take them unless I need to but they have helped me deal at times with full on panic attacks and now I don't know what to do if I get them. I am just going to try and stay positive and strong if I can. So bear with me everyone if it gets bad i'll be posting more on here! Thank you everyone for helping me through! What a day!