Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
(Today\'s "Wolf\'s Daily Howl"
Ilene Wolf\'s blog on the Healing Emotionally Abused Lives forum.)
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HEAL\'s new on YouTube!
We only have two of my TV clips on, so far (there are others, waiting to follow), but there I am.
The two that are up right now, are the two oldest: one from January of 2007 and one from last spring. I\'ve done about five more, since then, including one, just last evening.
It\'s hard to watch oneself on video.
I used to do theater work. With a script, I was someone else, and that was much safer.
Being Ilene is the hardest role to pull off!
The two clips up now, are my earliest attempts. I believe I have gotten more natural in front of the camera, at least a little. But whether I have or haven\'t, or how much I\'ve improved, if I have ------ is all basically irrelevant.
I\'m there for the message. Hopefully, as time goes on, I\'ll deliver it with more style. But that\'s secondary.
More spots to come. We just taped the latest on, last night.
See if you can find them. If you try and have trouble, let me know.
Lots and lots is happening every single day.
Stay tuned for whatever comes next.
(That\'s the point, allofus. We never know. As Helen Keller said: Life is either an incredible adventure, or it\'s nothing. Once her teacher, Anne Sullivan, helped connect the blind, deaf child to the world outside, it was for her, an amazing, fabulous, adventure. For me, as well!!!!!)
Love MUCH!
Ilene
Embrace non-violence
Ilene Wolf\'s blog on the Healing Emotionally Abused Lives forum.)
()()()()()()()()()
HEAL\'s new on YouTube!
We only have two of my TV clips on, so far (there are others, waiting to follow), but there I am.
The two that are up right now, are the two oldest: one from January of 2007 and one from last spring. I\'ve done about five more, since then, including one, just last evening.
It\'s hard to watch oneself on video.
I used to do theater work. With a script, I was someone else, and that was much safer.
Being Ilene is the hardest role to pull off!
The two clips up now, are my earliest attempts. I believe I have gotten more natural in front of the camera, at least a little. But whether I have or haven\'t, or how much I\'ve improved, if I have ------ is all basically irrelevant.
I\'m there for the message. Hopefully, as time goes on, I\'ll deliver it with more style. But that\'s secondary.
More spots to come. We just taped the latest on, last night.
See if you can find them. If you try and have trouble, let me know.
Lots and lots is happening every single day.
Stay tuned for whatever comes next.
(That\'s the point, allofus. We never know. As Helen Keller said: Life is either an incredible adventure, or it\'s nothing. Once her teacher, Anne Sullivan, helped connect the blind, deaf child to the world outside, it was for her, an amazing, fabulous, adventure. For me, as well!!!!!)
Love MUCH!
Ilene
Embrace non-violence
I agree, nothing ventured nothing gained...and my mother\'s favorite...."we\'re dead a long time"....I enjoy your website...thanks for sharing it with me....
Thanks for sharing!
I watched both videos and will be glad to see more. You are getting the message out there that any abuse is wrong.
Re: getting the word about emotional abuse out there . . . . .
I\'m working on it!
Here are the direct YouTube links:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bELZ6DCCmho
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ipgWARA-DTM&feature=related
What I meant about emotinal abuse being potentially deadly is multi-layered.
First and perhaps most directly, emotional abuse can lead to suicide. It nearly did for me.
Second, emotional abuse can be the underlying cause of many self-destructive, acting out behaviors, substance abuse leading the way, but just being one of many.
Third, emotional abuse that builds beyond the "breaking point" can turn physical. When it does, generally you don\'t see the perpetrator blacking eyes or breaking bones. How often do we hear on the national news that some quiet guy everyone thought was so great, takes out his wife, his kids, her family-of-origin, her co-workers and unrelated bystanders? At that point, they may not even label what happened "domestic violence." It\'s just murder.
That\'s what I meant when I wrote emotional abuse can be deadly.
I have other video clips that we couldn\'t up-load without editing (YouTube has a ten-minute limit). They\'re on the HEAL website, on the HEALing Along the Way page. I keep doing more media presentations; just finished another last night. I\'m going to see if my webmaster can get the longer ones down to ten mins so we can get the rest up.
calmzone ---- Oprah did have a show, I think it was four or five years ago. The scenario she highlighted presented the stereotypical situation: the overtly critical guy spitting offensive, nasty names at the wife and mother who, according to him, couldn\'t do anything right. It was a surface-scratcher. And as you correctly pointed out, hasn\'t done much more on the topic, since.
I began this work because, while there are some very good authors and their works out there (Evans\' "The Verbally Abusive Relationship" was my ah-ha moment), as a society, we\'re in a holding pattern. Because, for the first time in history, spousal battery was finally called out for what it was ----- unacceptable ----- everyone in a position to do something, seems to feel ----- hey, we\'ve come so far. We\'ve got shelters and protective orders and hey-----what else could you want?
What I want is for greater awareness and less tolerance of all aspects of emotional abuse ----- the overt and the covert.
Anyway, for all who stand, for all who walk their talk, for all who dance away, for all who laugh at sunset and sing in the dawn ---- practice self-care and healthy boundaries.
Love yourself!
Ilene
Looking forward to more videos!
You are so right. Before I found this forum, I found a bottle of sleeping pills. I laid in the floor and cried and begged God not to let me take my life. I would look in the mirror and say "you are ugly and stupid". He never loved you, you were a joke, sensative, nieve idiot. I never actually went through the three attempts. But I had mentally shut down to the point that dying was worse than staying. Only by the grace of God am I here with you fine ladies.
Thanks for all you do to advocate Emotional abuse. Hugs!
Thank you so much for the beautiful atta girl. We can all live without external validation. But aint it grand, when a little comes your way!!!!
And Tamehau ---- we are all so fortunate that the small voice of life brought you through that crisis, for yourself and for us fine ladies.
I\'m fortunate too.
Do you know Carolyn Myss\' book about sacred contracts?
I believe that I\'ve lived what I\'ve lived and experienced what I\'ve experienced, to arrive here on this day, on this thread, on my Howl and in my support circles, to bring information, empowerment and sometimes, perhaps even healing --- to myself and others.
Be well.
i.w.
I must say in my minds eye I have always pictured you almost exactly as you appear.
It may be telling of how genuine you are.
You give me hope for myself.
Thank you!