I'm sorry hon. Lonliness is just one of the emotions you will experience through this breakup. You will also be sad, and hurt just to name a few more. It is very normal to experience all of these feelings. I think as someone said, we are hurt b/c of what we felt life could have been, not by what it actually was. My best advice is to keep yourself busy, surround yourself with a supporting network {like DS} and try not to remember just the good times, remember the really bad times as well,and I promise the pain will subside alot faster.

i am not sure how long you were with him but i was with mine for five years and have children.it still bothers me to see him w someone but all the people i talked to on here say he is in a honeymoon phase and will treat them the same maybe worse.
these men dont change!!
i felt relief in the beginning even though i couldnt make up my own mind about anything my perception was faulty this was the effect of the emotional abuse.
i have to still be careful after years of being apart i am remarried and pregnant and still regress to the old what if i would have tried harder.(or maybe she is going to be the one who gets to be happy w him after all the years of turning myself inside out)
you really have to try to remember your darkest moments w him when you felt the most hurt alone and betrayed there is a reason you left !!!!!

(thank god for my journal these are just a few things i picked to share you from it before i left i started writing so i knew what was going on i needed a voice and to try to get a grip on reality)
try to write somethings down if you havent already then you can look back in moments of weakness... i just couldnt bare to think i failed and that he didnt really love me i still have to realize it was all a sick abusive relationship that preys on your good nature and kind heart to crush you like a bug...

(journal entries from several days)
i felt like things were hopeless and my self esteem would soon be in the toilet if i dont leave soon bombarded w negatives as usual as soon as i walked in door i hate how he makes me feel inside i am losing all hope and have little respect left for him.i wish we could build eachother up i am sure he doesnt need that but i do i honestly dont even think he likes me as a person...i am lazy messy no ambition overweight to him. i wish he saw the good stuff in me i hate the way my self esteem gets when i am with him..i am not all those bad things
i just asked for help today with why i still care about his approval and a few weeks ago about him finally dating and why it still bothers me none of it from what everyone says here is about love just manipulation please be strong you will have moments you just take them on breath then one minute then one hour then a day at a time you will be fine listen to the voice inside you it will guide you it is the same voice that told you to leave......

yes. it's bad at first. and since mine is a narcissistic ass, i DID see him w/ another woman! he purposely did it right in front of me to traumatize me even more. we work in the same bldg so he had her meet him for lunch in the cafeteria where i would see him daily. he did this 3 wks after i spent the night w/ him for his bday (and gave him a gift, and bought expensive lingerie for the event). he's a very sick, evil man and has left me w/ emotional scars i will have for life. i had a complete nervous breakdown at work, crying and shaking. i was a total nervous wreck. it took every ounce of my strength not to walk up to him and hurl my glass bottle of lipton iced tea at his big fat head. i really wanted to. but i survived. it's been 3 months and i have other narcissists to deal w/ which helps keep my mind off him. in the beginning i thought about him 24/7. couldnt sleep or eat. cried all the time. lost 15lbs -ate nothing for 5 days straight. worst pain i've ever been thru and never thought i'd survive. but i did and you will too. he's not worth your energy, or your tears. just stay strong until the worst part subsides. then you'll wonder why you ever wasted 1 second of your life thinking about his sorry ass.

Thanks. Part of the reason it is so hard for me is because he blames me for everything! He is bringing up stuff in the past that has been over and done with. But he brings it up to prove his point I guess. He argues with me about being contradicting..... which maybe I am sometimes but its like nothin I say is right. He has a problem with EVERY|THING i say.. so i contradict myself cuz I dont know what to say. He has me so screwed up in the head that I dont even kno how I really feel about things. My reasons for doing some of the things I have arent good enough. But all his excuses are good enough. It just frustrates me that I can't get my point across and I am always wrong when he couldnt do anything for me during the relationship