Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Here's my personal perspective
on what being healed would feel like:
To me, what being healed
would look and feel like
would be to wake up in
the morning with anticipation
for the day ahead. Then, I'd
be able to deal with all the
challenges I'd encounter with
poise and effective results.
I'd end the day with satisfaction
and think back on the day with
pride, joy and anticipation of
a good night's rest to prepare
for whatever might be on the
horizon, tomorrow.
On any given day, I'd find fulfillment
in my work, which would hopefully be
creative in some way. I'd be happy
with the male and female human
connections in my life and also
relationships with plants
and animals.
I'd be healthy physically, aging with
flexibility and growing emotionally.
My environment would surround me
with what I needed, in organization,
beauty and abundance. I'd consume
what nourishes and makes me strong
and energetic, and I'd exercise to be
fit and fabulous for whatever age I
have the opportunity to achieve.
That's what healing would look and
feel like to me. My journey has brought
me a long way towards my ultimate vision.
I'm not totally there, but most days seem
to get me a little bit closer, all the time.
What would healing feel like
to you?
on what being healed would feel like:
To me, what being healed
would look and feel like
would be to wake up in
the morning with anticipation
for the day ahead. Then, I'd
be able to deal with all the
challenges I'd encounter with
poise and effective results.
I'd end the day with satisfaction
and think back on the day with
pride, joy and anticipation of
a good night's rest to prepare
for whatever might be on the
horizon, tomorrow.
On any given day, I'd find fulfillment
in my work, which would hopefully be
creative in some way. I'd be happy
with the male and female human
connections in my life and also
relationships with plants
and animals.
I'd be healthy physically, aging with
flexibility and growing emotionally.
My environment would surround me
with what I needed, in organization,
beauty and abundance. I'd consume
what nourishes and makes me strong
and energetic, and I'd exercise to be
fit and fabulous for whatever age I
have the opportunity to achieve.
That's what healing would look and
feel like to me. My journey has brought
me a long way towards my ultimate vision.
I'm not totally there, but most days seem
to get me a little bit closer, all the time.
What would healing feel like
to you?
To me, I'm finding a change since I've been in an abusive relationship.
Healing would feel like this:
When someone complimented me consistently, and encouraged me and thanked me for my contributions. I wouldn't have to worry and have panic attacks, and be constantly vigilant that they were going to take off their mask to tell me how worthless I am. I would be able to enjoy that relationship, and be confident in myself, and accept the compliments.
I wouldn't have so many negative thoughts swarming my mind--but I would only have a few and be able to catch them and talk myself through them--and let them go. (working on that).
That's all so far.
I guess, in short, I'd be able to take joy out of positive relationships, and I wouldn't be constantly looking for the "strings" or the "seam" or waiting for the other shoe to drop. I would have control over my negative thoughts and have affirmations to work through them--and become increasingly strong and happy.
resonse, katya.
I know it's hard for
survivors to envision
what they've seldom,
if ever, seen.
Anyone else out there
want to give it, even a try?
Exercise can be
good for you.
peace and serenity
That's all I ever wanted from life...and it's what I plan to have as soon as I'm free. I also intend to regain my self esteem, my self worth, my dignity and self respect. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and have every reason to smile, to go to bed at night and have every reason to smile...
I don't necessarily want to forget the pain because it will be a reminder of what life was like before freedom, but I expect to suffer less and less until all the suffering is gone.
Healing would feel like the gentle ebb and flow of the ocean on the sandy beach, like the flow of the river meandering it's way to the sea. Like a gentle breeze in my hair and on my skin. Like love, like self love, like the unconditional love of a precious family member, like the trust in a puppy dogs eyes, like the scent of a baby....
One day I will heal and I will feel all of the above...
Feeling the breeze caress me, the sun upon my cheek, to cry and laugh with abandon, without consequence.
To make my own decisions and chart my own course, to choose the next step, the next word, the next pleasure to enjoy.
Healing will be living my life with myself at the centre, not as a tiny, neglected planet revolving around my abuser in a fixed cycle over which i have no power.
More than anything else, I look forward to the experience of healing. To leaving this shell of my abused self behind and rediscovering who I really am.
Healing would mean being confident enough to walk away at the first sign of abuse.
Healing would mean having a sense of purpose in life with goals being set and pursued.
Healing would mean having the confidence and trust in my own judgement to gain friends that are trustworthy.
Healing would mean not fearing failure and being confident enough to take the steps needed to pursue my goals.
Healing would mean not being so dependent on my abusive family members.
Healing would mean not having the need or the desire to explain my choices in life, like staying single, to those who don't agree.
Healing would mean seeing people for who they are, not for what I wished they would be.
And healing would mean knowing without any doubt that I deserve respect and love in my life and
refusing to accept anything less.
For me being healed will mean being able to sit on the settee with my daughter, knowing that I really am doing my best to protect her from harm rather than just 'probably' protecting her. It will mean looking in the mirror each day and seeing the amazing person I used to be, rather than the fragile shell I have become. It will mean being able to express my emotions freely without fearing they will be misinterpreted and cause me more suffering. It will mean not having to worry that things other people say or do may later be taken out on me and being able to have a proper relationship with my family and friends again. It will mean sunny days and beautiful starry night's of freedom. I can't wait to get there :)
being free. . . . . . """""""""""""""""
I love that.
Sending all who read this
thoughts for strength to
vision freedom
and the
power to
enact that freedom!
In my life, healing feels
like living my own life
again.
It feels like living.
Healing feels like
loving my self.
Healing feels like
loving my life.
Healing feels like
passion, and
enthusiasm
and energy.
Healing
feels
WONDERFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think you'll realize someday soon that you made it farther down this path than you realize just now. Awesome that you can name all that, you know what I mean?
*Blessings*
It would be my blood not boiling at the sound of his pathetic whimpering victim voice while he manipulates my daughter.
It would be not having nightmares every time I am forced to see him in person for custody exchange.
It would mean being able to make decisions about my social life and talking to friends without taking into account my experience with him. (Like right now I am afraid to have an intimate friendship with a man because I don't want to end up a victim again)
It would mean being able to let go of resentment and anger because he doesn't deserve even that much time, emotion, and effort from me.
It is NOT feeling fear. Even when I have to deal with him. Not feeling fear when things happen outside of my "plan" but instead seeing it as a possible opportunity, for something. To move ahead, to get where I want to go more quickly.
It is trusting, again. In myself, my family, my friends, and the Universe.
I believe it's a life-long process. I think I needed healing before I ever met him. I think there is always another layer that can be peeled away, to bring us closer to our authentic self.
I'm not at the joy every moment place yet, but I believe it's possible. I'm not at the never any fear place yet, but I believe it's possible. I'm not at the trusting completely point yet but I DO trust myself, and so...I find it much easier to trust others, and to weed out the ones that are not trustworthy.
When I think of him now, I think of the severely damaged human being he is, that he had to treat us all like that. The person he hurt most with his abuse, in the end, is himself.