Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Feeling pretty overwhelmed. It's been a really tough week filled with all of the reading I'm doing and things I'm realizing about my husband, myself and our life together. It wasnt always like this. Maybe the past 10 years or so, but the last 3 have been worse and the last 2 weeks have been very difficult.
I feel like I'm on the outside watching my life happen. It's weird I cant explain it well.
He's pretty much honoring my request for space even though we didnt separate. He's still living here but he'll go downstairs at night after I put the kids to bed. We did talk a bit last night. He's having a tough time at work with his assistant and said it's been a stressful week here at home too. He looked so sad. I felt so bad.
He also asked about us doing some work on the house that we've been talking about for a yr now. I was honest and said
Me: I think we should hold off.
Husband: why?
Me: I said you need me to say it?
H: yes.
Me: well, we dont know what's going on with us, I still need some space and I dont want to put money into the house if God forbid we end up separated or divorced.
H: Well, even if we did, you would still live here and it's money put towards the house.
Me: I dont think I cld live here. Altho I still haven't sat with you to go over our finances and bills so I'm not sure, but I'm thinking I'd get an apt.
That was the end of that convo. He left to go to the gym looking all sad.
We got married and were supposed to emotionally compliment each other and respect each other and I just feel so lost.
I've looked and was able to find an IC who has much experience with abusive relationships and I've got my first appt next wed.
I hate this. Feel so numb one minute and just like crying the next. Part of me wishes I never dug deep and found this stuff out. It's just so much to bear and deal with. I know I compounded the situation with my choices too.
I invited friends over for dinner tonight. Figured a little normalcy and seeing the kids playing together would be a little escape from all these feelings.
Sorry for the rambling, just a really sad day.
I feel like I'm on the outside watching my life happen. It's weird I cant explain it well.
He's pretty much honoring my request for space even though we didnt separate. He's still living here but he'll go downstairs at night after I put the kids to bed. We did talk a bit last night. He's having a tough time at work with his assistant and said it's been a stressful week here at home too. He looked so sad. I felt so bad.
He also asked about us doing some work on the house that we've been talking about for a yr now. I was honest and said
Me: I think we should hold off.
Husband: why?
Me: I said you need me to say it?
H: yes.
Me: well, we dont know what's going on with us, I still need some space and I dont want to put money into the house if God forbid we end up separated or divorced.
H: Well, even if we did, you would still live here and it's money put towards the house.
Me: I dont think I cld live here. Altho I still haven't sat with you to go over our finances and bills so I'm not sure, but I'm thinking I'd get an apt.
That was the end of that convo. He left to go to the gym looking all sad.
We got married and were supposed to emotionally compliment each other and respect each other and I just feel so lost.
I've looked and was able to find an IC who has much experience with abusive relationships and I've got my first appt next wed.
I hate this. Feel so numb one minute and just like crying the next. Part of me wishes I never dug deep and found this stuff out. It's just so much to bear and deal with. I know I compounded the situation with my choices too.
I invited friends over for dinner tonight. Figured a little normalcy and seeing the kids playing together would be a little escape from all these feelings.
Sorry for the rambling, just a really sad day.
Keep taking care of yourself, keep moving forward, and I hope you feel better soon.
Friends are here and things feel normal. But it's a distraction. I'm not looking forward to the uncomfortable feelings once everyone leaves.