Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
in april of 2012 my father died.
somehow this amazing man, who had already showered love, affection, warmth and support all over me my entire life, managed to give me one more gift in his death. like he hit the light switch on his way out the door and a 2,000 watt bulb shone down on my ex, showing him for the despicable, pathetic excuse for a human he is. his absolute apathy and cruelty in the face of my profound grief made his double talk and dismissive attitude of contempt so clear, so stark, that things i had been confused about for years suddenly hit me in the face like a shovel. i coiled like a snake, and as soon as i had the energy to stand from the pit of hell i lay in, alone, crying for my dad, i struck.
april, 2013, almost a year to the day after my father's death, we argue over something small that grows and grows, because i can't swallow anymore, and we start to crumble. by may i am sleeping in another room, and we are at a standoff because i insist that he stop the bullshit. he doesn't
june, 2013 i throw him out of the house. i dump his crap out the second story window. i burn love notes. i smash pictures.
october 2013 although he insists he wants to "fix" things, he sabotages every chance i give him immediately, then lies during our one and only marriage counseling session. i get migraines, panic attacks, and start sleeping all the time.
december 2013 i tell my son that santa is going to be bringing daddy's presents somewhere else from now on
feb 2014 we start mediation. there are shouting matches, physical altercations. my son yells that he loves daddy better, and it's my fault that he doesn't live here.
august 2014 i hire a lawyer. i have to borrow money. but i'm not getting headaches, i start thinking about my future.
nov 2014 i sign my divorce papers, listen to "eye of the tiger" on drive home.
it's been two and a half years since one of the lowest lows in my life, and much of the time since then has been spent yelling and weeping and trying not to hyperventilate. but i'm here. i made it. and i am so grateful to know i will get more chances at happiness, and i hope my dad can see. i think he would be psyched.
somehow this amazing man, who had already showered love, affection, warmth and support all over me my entire life, managed to give me one more gift in his death. like he hit the light switch on his way out the door and a 2,000 watt bulb shone down on my ex, showing him for the despicable, pathetic excuse for a human he is. his absolute apathy and cruelty in the face of my profound grief made his double talk and dismissive attitude of contempt so clear, so stark, that things i had been confused about for years suddenly hit me in the face like a shovel. i coiled like a snake, and as soon as i had the energy to stand from the pit of hell i lay in, alone, crying for my dad, i struck.
april, 2013, almost a year to the day after my father's death, we argue over something small that grows and grows, because i can't swallow anymore, and we start to crumble. by may i am sleeping in another room, and we are at a standoff because i insist that he stop the bullshit. he doesn't
june, 2013 i throw him out of the house. i dump his crap out the second story window. i burn love notes. i smash pictures.
october 2013 although he insists he wants to "fix" things, he sabotages every chance i give him immediately, then lies during our one and only marriage counseling session. i get migraines, panic attacks, and start sleeping all the time.
december 2013 i tell my son that santa is going to be bringing daddy's presents somewhere else from now on
feb 2014 we start mediation. there are shouting matches, physical altercations. my son yells that he loves daddy better, and it's my fault that he doesn't live here.
august 2014 i hire a lawyer. i have to borrow money. but i'm not getting headaches, i start thinking about my future.
nov 2014 i sign my divorce papers, listen to "eye of the tiger" on drive home.
it's been two and a half years since one of the lowest lows in my life, and much of the time since then has been spent yelling and weeping and trying not to hyperventilate. but i'm here. i made it. and i am so grateful to know i will get more chances at happiness, and i hope my dad can see. i think he would be psyched.
Warm hugs
Congratulations!!!! I wish you the very best!!!
((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))
~Hugs~
right there inside you.
(I know, because mine
is inside me; he sent
me a similar kind of
gift ----- an earth-shaking
epiphany ---- not long
after his passing.)
The journey you've been
on is a rocky one. Even
with the challenges,
look how far you've come!!!
Sending you celebrational
fireworks and wishes for
all the best things and
all that makes your heart
glow with joy, in the new
era you're entering.
My dad passed in march 2009. His passing gave me the strength to open up to my family about what was going on. I wish my dad knew. It also gave me the strength a year later to kick my ex out.
My ex passed way in April 2012 (drank himself to death). His family tried to keep up the abuse for him, but I would have nothing to do with it. My children chose to end the toxic relationship with them as well.