Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I feel so mentally abused around these people i call my family... My brother has anger issues, My dad's an alchoholic, and my mom is always trying to hold things together but blames everything falling apart on ANYBODY ELSE BUT HER. How do i cope with such a broken household? I'm always being screamed at for doing absolutely nothing wrong. I NEVER want to come home, I'm always trying to make plans with friends. If that doesn't work i shut myself in my room all day and watch Netflix. But i don't want to do those things. I want to be able to walk into my living room without being yelled at for once, or at least learn ways to cope or calm that person down and talk to them or something. Anything really. Can somebody please help me?
I'm so sorry this is the
way you're living.
Please go to your school
nurse, guidance counselor
or a teacher you really trust.
If you don't feel you can talk
to anyone there, then go to
your family doctor or someone
at your church or a relative
you totally trust.
Ask whomever you go to
to set you up with a counselor
whose specialty is dysfunctional
families.
A good therapist will give you
techniques to cope with your
situation. For the record, though. . . .
it's NOT your responsibility to
calm down anyone who's out
of control (your brother?) or to
talk to them about anything. Doing
that could jeopardize your safety.
That's not a job for a teenager.
Your job is to be focused
on school and friends,
and to graduate with
good grades and go
on to make yourself
the life you want to
live ------ not to fix
your chaotic family.
Your job is to make
sure that you feel
good and peaceful
within yourself, and
that you become the
healthy, fully-functioning
adult who will be able
to live life to the fullest
and not be crippled by
the bumpy start that
you had nothing to do
with, other than just
be there by the luck
of the draw.
In the months while
you're still in school
before summer break,
talk to someone there
or to anyone else with
whom you feel safely
connected.
Also, there are groups
for family members of
alcoholics, that have
helped many people.
They're called Al anon.
There's even a division
called Alateen.
Go to al-anon.org/find-a-meeting
Finally, making plans
with friends is generally
a good strategy if you're
also working together
with a professional who's
supporting and guiding
you.
In a few years you're
going to be old enough
to begin spending more
time away from this
chaotic home. Build
yourself into a strong
young woman, and
you'll have a chance
to launch yourself
into a life that works
for you.
Sending you hugs
and wishes for
better times ahead.
Like others have suggested, take steps to help yourself handle this situation, but also take care of yourself and focus on you and your schooling. If you can, try not to engage in the negativity and anger. When they start yelling at you just go blank, don't let the negative words and actions affect you personally, they are just acting out their own issues on you. It really has nothing to do with you at all. You aren't the cause of everyone elses issues and anger, it has more to do with themselves and how they are handling life. They just might not be aware that they are really unhappy with themselves enough to change their behavior.
I wish you the best and that all the help you need will be readily available to you. You are stronger than you know. And know that this is just a season in your life. It will pass and you will have a newer, better season eventually. Blessing, love and hugs to you on this journey. You will come out stronger and more resilient from all of this.