Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
"I am powerless over others and my life has become unmanageable"
This is the first of 12 steps. I hope it begins to help me with my codependence.
I am going to try to work the CODA 12 steps
but its hard because I am doing it alone.
I will try to find CODA groups
there are 2 near me
but this week the times are not working for me.
They are mon at 6:30pm and tuesday at 6:30
and I am doing a lenten retreat this week at those times.
So maybe I can try one next week
but in the meantime I am admitting:
In this moment ,
I do not have to control anyone,
including me.
And if I feel uncomfortable
with what another person is doing,
or not doing,
I can remind myself
that I am powerless over this person
and I am powerless over my compulsion
to act in inappropriate ways.
I surrender!
This is the first of 12 steps. I hope it begins to help me with my codependence.
I am going to try to work the CODA 12 steps
but its hard because I am doing it alone.
I will try to find CODA groups
there are 2 near me
but this week the times are not working for me.
They are mon at 6:30pm and tuesday at 6:30
and I am doing a lenten retreat this week at those times.
So maybe I can try one next week
but in the meantime I am admitting:
In this moment ,
I do not have to control anyone,
including me.
And if I feel uncomfortable
with what another person is doing,
or not doing,
I can remind myself
that I am powerless over this person
and I am powerless over my compulsion
to act in inappropriate ways.
I surrender!
Are you using the workbooks?
My meeting is today - kids are home sick so I won't be going.
What I am finding in my "not trying to control" is that I am coming off very cold. Simply because I do not know how else to behave. This to me is better than engaging. There are still many times I do engage but at least it's not every time.
There is a codependent board here on DS that I lurk on as well.
Seawee
So this article sat in my bag for a month before I actually found a meeting to go to. BLESS those people there. They saved my life from a man who blacken my eyes and almost killed me.
I went everyday to a meeting for 2 years. It changed me as a person. Opened my eyes to a life I never knew existed. It is the best 12 step program ever.
Don't get me wrong...I made mistakes and remarried my H now. A totally different kind of abuse...emotional underhanded abuse. However, its only 2 yrs in and I am almost out. I live a pretty independent lift since Coda. I like my own company and am ok with it. I never could before it.
So my feeling is that everyone in abusive situations can and would benefit from these meetings. Codependency is a lot like drug addictions. You are always in recovery. You are never cured...you just gain tools and strength to help you stay off the drug...or the toxic relationship.
It is exciting to be doign the 12 steps and to hear you are doing it too...best best of luck with it!
Hey I just went on there and yes! It is pretty active!