Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
My sister who has been verbally abused along with her kids feels that she has to stay for 2 more years (due to her child's disability). She has already pulled way back emotionally and physically from her husband. Her husband doesn't seem to care as long as my sister is not "bringing up the past" as her husband says. "Bringing up the past is any reference to the fact that thier daughter is afraid to drive because he screamed at her after her accident, called their daughter's boyfriend a "piece of sh**" which caused huge problems, and curses at the kids.
Should my sister continue to keep her mouth shut even when she hears people say things that remind her of how unacceptable her husband's behavior is?
For example. a friend of my sisters child was in an accident and the friend made a point of saying how careful the parents were being to not make their child feel even worse and more nervous about driving. When my sister hears this it makes her feel how wrong her husband's reactions to things are and she tends to bring it up to him. When she does, he gets angry because he says that she "doesn't give me a break."
The problem is that other people remind my sister of how unacceptable her husbands behavior is. Her husband's answer to this is "nobody's house is perfect and everyone has something."
Should my sister continue to keep her mouth shut even when she hears people say things that remind her of how unacceptable her husband's behavior is?
For example. a friend of my sisters child was in an accident and the friend made a point of saying how careful the parents were being to not make their child feel even worse and more nervous about driving. When my sister hears this it makes her feel how wrong her husband's reactions to things are and she tends to bring it up to him. When she does, he gets angry because he says that she "doesn't give me a break."
The problem is that other people remind my sister of how unacceptable her husbands behavior is. Her husband's answer to this is "nobody's house is perfect and everyone has something."
Other than that, your sister needs to sit down and sort out her priorities. From what you have been able to tell us we all feel that your sister is being abused. The issue now is how to get her to do something about it. Considering everything you have said and shared up to this point we all know how much you love her and care for her. But until she wants to actually do something about her situation it isn't going to change. And just so you know, by "do something" i mean leave him. The counseling and the intervention programs have a breathtakingly low rate of positive outcomes.
Have you considered getting *her* on this board?