Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I am sorry... I just need to vent and get some feed back about boundaries!
I am self-employed, and work in a service-based industry. I always handle my clients with care, and often times they become like friends... They confide in me about their personal lives, and often end up telling me way more than I would ever feel comfortable sharing about myself. I have no problem listening to them, as it is a part of my job... However, I am always very careful not to reveal too much about myself.
I never disclosed that I was in a relationship (and was hardly ever asked), let alone an abusive relationship. I think that from the outside my life seems ideal... I drive a nice car, live in a nice house, yadda, yadda. However, as everyone here knows images hardly convey the truth. Many of my clients seem to think that I have no problems. They don't know that a month ago I was suicidal, that I ended one of the most significant and damaging relationships of my life, or that I have been suffering a crisis of conscience....
They don't know that one of the things that led me to being suicidal was my work... It is no longer my life's purpose, and I am so far off track from the callings of my own soul that it is painful at times.
If I hadn't been involved with an abuser, there is no way I would have continued on in the field I am working in... It is just that he had my head so f*cked up that I felt like I had no choices, no options... He lowered my self-worth so much that I could barely continued on working day to day, let alone dream and create my own future. I just kept waiting and waiting... For things to get better, for him to be come the ideal partner, y'all know the rest!!!
Needless to say, while I have been careful to fulfill all of my obligations to my clients, I have not been nearly as emotionally available as I had been before. I am trying to rebuild my life! The fact that I no longer jump when a client calls (to listen to their problems), is starting to become noticed and offending people!
I no longer hesitate to end a conversation when I have plans, or drop my social life just to go to work. I am in therapy at least once weekly and have committed to healing myself. This means meditation, exercise, going out with friends, basically learning how to love myself again.
At the end of the day I am wiped!
I have tried to let my clients know that despite having other obligations, I will still meet their needs. I tell them when I will be in touch and I follow through...
The last straw came with this email:
(My Name):
Please. I would love to read a more detailed response about your thoughts and just what you have been up to! Lately, I have felt like I have been watching you go, round and round, on the ferris wheel of life, waving each time you pass.
How do you like that metaphor?
***
And this is after I specifically answered their questions, and promised them a more detailed response when I returned home this evening.
Is it just me or is this rude?
I am self-employed, and work in a service-based industry. I always handle my clients with care, and often times they become like friends... They confide in me about their personal lives, and often end up telling me way more than I would ever feel comfortable sharing about myself. I have no problem listening to them, as it is a part of my job... However, I am always very careful not to reveal too much about myself.
I never disclosed that I was in a relationship (and was hardly ever asked), let alone an abusive relationship. I think that from the outside my life seems ideal... I drive a nice car, live in a nice house, yadda, yadda. However, as everyone here knows images hardly convey the truth. Many of my clients seem to think that I have no problems. They don't know that a month ago I was suicidal, that I ended one of the most significant and damaging relationships of my life, or that I have been suffering a crisis of conscience....
They don't know that one of the things that led me to being suicidal was my work... It is no longer my life's purpose, and I am so far off track from the callings of my own soul that it is painful at times.
If I hadn't been involved with an abuser, there is no way I would have continued on in the field I am working in... It is just that he had my head so f*cked up that I felt like I had no choices, no options... He lowered my self-worth so much that I could barely continued on working day to day, let alone dream and create my own future. I just kept waiting and waiting... For things to get better, for him to be come the ideal partner, y'all know the rest!!!
Needless to say, while I have been careful to fulfill all of my obligations to my clients, I have not been nearly as emotionally available as I had been before. I am trying to rebuild my life! The fact that I no longer jump when a client calls (to listen to their problems), is starting to become noticed and offending people!
I no longer hesitate to end a conversation when I have plans, or drop my social life just to go to work. I am in therapy at least once weekly and have committed to healing myself. This means meditation, exercise, going out with friends, basically learning how to love myself again.
At the end of the day I am wiped!
I have tried to let my clients know that despite having other obligations, I will still meet their needs. I tell them when I will be in touch and I follow through...
The last straw came with this email:
(My Name):
Please. I would love to read a more detailed response about your thoughts and just what you have been up to! Lately, I have felt like I have been watching you go, round and round, on the ferris wheel of life, waving each time you pass.
How do you like that metaphor?
***
And this is after I specifically answered their questions, and promised them a more detailed response when I returned home this evening.
Is it just me or is this rude?
Keep up the good work and take care of yourself, and you have every right to take time to yourself and the comment was not rude it was imformative.
IMO