Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I was severly abused physically and emotionally by my mother from birth until about 5. I have told people I was abused but never ever told details and not sure I am ready to yet. what I will say is horrible things happened, some of which almost cost me my life. I was taken away by the state and raised by my grandparents. well 6 years ago I get a call that my dad is dieng. I talked to him and made amends with him. he apologized and wept. but my mom says she didn't do anything I didn't deserve. then she later said that she may have made mistakes but did love me. so I have tried hard for the past 6 years now since my dad passed, to get along with he by calling. I don't see her cause she lives 17 hrs away plus I never want to see her alive again. I am a christain lady and want to do right but when I call her,she lies, manipulates, and still plays mind games with me. I don't want to talk to her any more. I will never get her full love or any true love at all. I feel so angry and sad and many other emotions after talking to her. as a christain, is it right for me to break all ties with her or not?
I have a son. The man who took part in the conception of my son was my husband at the time. And he was abusive. The worst things he did (in my mind) threatened the life of my son. My view now is that my son doesn't have a father. I know the Bible talks about honouring your father and mother - but in my view, they must first BE a father and mother. My son's sperm donor is not a father. And it sounds like your womb donor was and is not a mother.
I believe strongly that, no matter what your religious views, taking care of yourself should be first and foremost. Did not even Mother Theresa eat while those around her starved? What good could she have done, if she gave all her food to the starving, thus dying herself? How much MORE good did she do by eating, though those around her starved?
Feed yourself. Emotionally, feed yourself. Your mother, it seems, is taking the emotional food from you even as you try to eat. So cut that from your life. It's hard to cut a parent from your life (I cut my whole family for a time ... I now speak to them again, but it's a strained relationship at best). But you need and deserve to take care of you.
Plus, she was never a mother, even if she did give birth to you.
No one but you can decide.
But I do agree with Livnd.
No loving creator wants
their precious children
to be abused.
I read your profile. You've
suffered too much.
Have you worked with a
clinician whose specialty
addresses abuse, or any
of the issues you've had
to deal with? If not, I
suggest that you consider
participating in therapy.
It's helped many of us
process the emotional
injuries caused by having
been abused.
On a personal note, I had
one sibling. That sibling
was abusive to me, over
the course of time.
Finally, with a heavy heart,
I cut that person out of my
life.
It was the beginning of
my healing journey.
It's so sad that I had
to do that. But, now,
I'm so much healthier.
I wish them no ill.
I just did what I
had to to protect
my own well-being.
Here's a prayer I
use a lot:
Bless the being
and the path
they're on.
Sending you hugs
and healing wishes.
Please take good care.