Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
After watching a series on cable about people that marry Cons or Goldiggers or who knows what, I can look at my situations and think, ya know, it could be worse. I have been cheated on, Yes, I have been lied to, Yes, but WOW, there has been some people that have been through some pretty horrific things with relationships.
One story was about a woman that married an abusive man that did not want the divorce and actually would not respect her restraining/order of protection. He kept harassing/stalking her and after the judge dismissed the order after the year was up, he showed up at her workplace and threw a bottle of gas on her, then when she ran away from him outside, threw a lighted match on her, catching her on fire burning her over 60% of her body. She did survive, but had to have repeated operations. He did get life in prison I believe but she is scarred not only physically, but emotionally and mentally.
There are stories of not only women, but men losing thier homes, jobs and health over an abusive ex spouse or lover. Some abusers have even harmed or killed in thier destruction.
I have lost some money and some things. I have lost some dignity, some damage emotionally, physically and mentally has been done yes, but compared to some of these people, I have been fortunate. I have a home, a job, a vehicle. I have not lost a child, a parent, my health ( as in being burned or paralyzed due to a severe trauma)
I have been sexually abused but have not been given an STD, as in the case of a woman that was in a 4 year long relationship with a Lothario, who purposely lied to her, cheated on her, took her not only for her heart but her money, and gave her the AIDs virus. He withheld that information from her for the last 2 years of their relatonship, cheating on her with various women, and gave it to at least 6 other women that she found out about. :(
I mean OMG, what creates such evil?
He is in jail now and the 6 women all stood holding hands while his verdict of guilty for each of the women infected with Aids was read. He showed no remorse and would of kept infecting women had he not been stopped.
I really feel that we all have an accountability, a responsibility in life. No one in life has it easy. We all have our ups and downs. We all have our battles to fight. It is how we treat others and show respect and compassion that makes us human and not just another abuser. Every day we make a choice to at the least show the kindness that perhaps we were not shown and make a difference.....
Just my opinion.
One story was about a woman that married an abusive man that did not want the divorce and actually would not respect her restraining/order of protection. He kept harassing/stalking her and after the judge dismissed the order after the year was up, he showed up at her workplace and threw a bottle of gas on her, then when she ran away from him outside, threw a lighted match on her, catching her on fire burning her over 60% of her body. She did survive, but had to have repeated operations. He did get life in prison I believe but she is scarred not only physically, but emotionally and mentally.
There are stories of not only women, but men losing thier homes, jobs and health over an abusive ex spouse or lover. Some abusers have even harmed or killed in thier destruction.
I have lost some money and some things. I have lost some dignity, some damage emotionally, physically and mentally has been done yes, but compared to some of these people, I have been fortunate. I have a home, a job, a vehicle. I have not lost a child, a parent, my health ( as in being burned or paralyzed due to a severe trauma)
I have been sexually abused but have not been given an STD, as in the case of a woman that was in a 4 year long relationship with a Lothario, who purposely lied to her, cheated on her, took her not only for her heart but her money, and gave her the AIDs virus. He withheld that information from her for the last 2 years of their relatonship, cheating on her with various women, and gave it to at least 6 other women that she found out about. :(
I mean OMG, what creates such evil?
He is in jail now and the 6 women all stood holding hands while his verdict of guilty for each of the women infected with Aids was read. He showed no remorse and would of kept infecting women had he not been stopped.
I really feel that we all have an accountability, a responsibility in life. No one in life has it easy. We all have our ups and downs. We all have our battles to fight. It is how we treat others and show respect and compassion that makes us human and not just another abuser. Every day we make a choice to at the least show the kindness that perhaps we were not shown and make a difference.....
Just my opinion.
:/
But you're right. I could have it so much worse and so many people do. I'm thankful every day for the love and support of my family and friends.
I pray for those demented souls that seek to only cause harm.
I show kindness freely until the point that I am not shown kindness in return.
I will call abuse and I will confront abuse and my abusers from now on.
I should have marked this with Triggers * If a moderator or someone can do so, please feel free to flag this with a trigger for those that may be upset by these stories.
It is not my intent to do any harm to anyone on here. It was my intent to show the bravery and courage of how people rise above abuse and survive and how we manage to keep our lives in order and our goodness and compassion.
I did not write this in the right manner.
The lady that was so malicously attacked at the cell phone store is doing pretty good and has two beautiful grandchildren and seems to be healthy and looks well.
The lady that was misled by the online man and given the virus is getting shots for her Aids, and is doing well also, she is a Martial Arts instructor and is so full of life, vivacious, attractive and strong.
I was awed by both of them.
I just think that as targets and survivors we have been taking on the responsibility for other peoples feelings for long enough by being kind while we are emotionally whipped and battered. Many of us have been raised to believe that whatever bad thing happens to our abusers are our fault and making them feel better is our responsibility.
It isn't.
We have a responsibility to ourselves too. And when we make a conscious decision to respond firmly and decisively, we are met with resistance and more abuse, and not just by our abusers. Society and other women really have a hard time accepting assertive, firm responses from other women. We are all expected to be soft and sugar and spice.
And that is absolute nonsense.
I have those days that I find it hard to find the positive and I just try to find things to be thankful for. Shows like these make me realize the tenacity and courage of others and how I really need to focus on the future more and the past less.
It truly is a day by day process and sometimes even a second by second one. ...