Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hello everyone
I've just discovered this website since someone recommended I should talk about this with people who have experienced it.
I got out of an abusive relationship. I won't go in details because it's very long and complicated, all I can say is that the abuse was mental/emotional, and sometimes "sexual", I don't know if I may call it that way but he did try to touch me against my will and ..actually succeeded because I surrendered, otherwise he would get mad and I would have been in trouble. Anyways, he stopped talking to me and trying to get me back around.. 6months after the break up. I was the one who broke up I have no idea how I got that strength. But I'm really glad I did. Except that was only the first step towards recovery... I have no idea what the next steps are tho, that is why I'm here. I still think about what I went through and it hurts horribly. I feel stuck, because I'm reminded all the time of what happened, and I have no idea how to get over it
I'm seeking help as to what I can do to go further in life
Thank you !
I've just discovered this website since someone recommended I should talk about this with people who have experienced it.
I got out of an abusive relationship. I won't go in details because it's very long and complicated, all I can say is that the abuse was mental/emotional, and sometimes "sexual", I don't know if I may call it that way but he did try to touch me against my will and ..actually succeeded because I surrendered, otherwise he would get mad and I would have been in trouble. Anyways, he stopped talking to me and trying to get me back around.. 6months after the break up. I was the one who broke up I have no idea how I got that strength. But I'm really glad I did. Except that was only the first step towards recovery... I have no idea what the next steps are tho, that is why I'm here. I still think about what I went through and it hurts horribly. I feel stuck, because I'm reminded all the time of what happened, and I have no idea how to get over it
I'm seeking help as to what I can do to go further in life
Thank you !
First, congratulations on getting out. You're right, that's the first step. The trauma and pain caused by abuse is complicated and it goes deep, even if the relationship didn't last that long. The longer one was/is an abusive relationship, the longer it will take to recover.
The next steps are
first & foremost, get into counseling with a QUALIFIED therapist who has had extra training in trauma release/recovery and who understands the affects of abuse. Sadly not all therapists do. Extra training means training over and above what they got to get their degrees & license. That training, IMHO, should include additional healing modalities that may include, but are not limited to, hypnotherapy, EMDR, EFT, etc. It's been my experience that talk therapy alone doesn't heal the deep wounds/trauma caused by abuse.
In addition,
* allow yourself to feel your feelings w/o judgment
* give yourself all the time you need to recover - there is no set time frame
* know that part of the recovery process will include going thru the grief process
* take extra good care of yourself
It will get better as you take the necessary steps to heal. Unfortunately, time alone will not heal trauma. So, keep reading and posting here.
~healing hugs~
Thank you so much for the information and the support.
I will just add some things. My relationship lasted about a year and 4 months. I also did not mention that I am a teen (18 turning 19), I live with my mother and I can't tell her about why my relationship ended and how it was, we don't communicate well. I did see a therapist tho but in my country, they're really not qualified for that at all. So my question is, can I get this help you mentionned online? Thank you
I'm sorry to say that I think it would be very difficult to get the help you need on line. Most good therapists want to see their clients in person.
Are you in college? If so, does your college offer any counseling services? If they do, they may be able to refer you to someone specially trained.
Another option is to contact your city's women's shelter to see if they offer counseling or referrals to counselors who specialize in recovery from the trauma of sexual assault and abuse.
I hope this helps.
I'm impressed by how some countries are so well aware and organised about abuse.. it's such a serious issue.
Thank you again for the help
~hugs~