So my husband saw his "psychologist" yesterday and he was ever so eager to tell me about is appointment. He told me how he spent about 10 to 20 minutes telling the psychologist about why he was there, about his childhood, how he was so critical of me, how he wants to learn to better communicte, etc. I payed specific attention to what he was saying about what he told the psychologist about me and how he treated me. I asked him what he said exactly and he said something along the lines of emotional abuse (he kind of brushed over the term) and I then asked what the pscyhologist said about that and he said the therapist didn't specifically coin it as "Emotional Abuse" and said that my husband is very intelligent, speaks well but he can understand that he may not communicate on my level as I am an emotional communicator? He said the therapist asked if there was any physical abuse and he said no (which is true, although sometimes I think that would make things easier for me). Anyway.... He went on to tell the psychologist that I told him the other night that he is controlling and that he never saw it that way and that was not what his intentions. I guess the psychologist asked what he meant and he proceeded to tell him that I told him he controlled me when it came to me seeing my family. He proceeded to tell the psychologist that I have a large italian family and he mentioned how he has a very small family. The therapist asked how often we see my family and he said 2 times per month and the therapist told him that he is italian too and twice a month is a lot to see a family......... What?!

So his session ended with the psychologist telling him he needs to work on his communication and learn how to speak to me.......

I saw my therapist today and told her everything that has happened this week and discussed my husbands "psychologist" appointment. My therapist was a little surprised about the things the psychologist told my husband about seeing family too much, that he only needs to work on his communication and overall the somewhat downplayed outcome and plan, it left her a little perplexed with what exactly was portrayed by my husband to the pscyhologst. I knew that I thought it was a little weird but was glad to know that a professional licensed in this area confirmed my thoughts.

I am trying to be strong. I am trying to accept the realization that if my husband has not accepted fully what he has done he will likely not change. My biggest fear is that I will never again be able to think he is not manipulating me.