On the down side, I n=now have irrefutable proof that yet another person hates me.

I was cast in Oliver as Mr. Bumble.

The fellow playing Fagin was also abused by his wife, and was very kind to me.

I was kicked out of the cast and the company.

He stayed in contact a bit - not much, but still encouraging and supportive.

He dies yesterday. Suddenly. No word on why.

The producer puts together a memorial service for him, at a local applebees we all hang out at.

I'm concerned for the kids - I've done several shows with them, and they worked closely with him. I"m also grieving myself, and want to be with whatever friends are there.

I walk in (after first making sure that the gilr who has a restraining order against me is not there).

T, the producer, looks at me and says 'I can't believe you had the balls to come here.'

'NO one wants you here. You are not a part of this cast. You never deserved to be a part of this cast. This is low, even for you. This is really bottom-feeding behavior, even from you. Say what you want to say, and GET OUT.'

I say 'Michael was a very kind man, and he impacted me...'

'I can't believe that you would do something like this. Look at all these people you're making uncomfortable, just by being here.'

'Well, actually, I just walked in and sat down, while you seem to be the one really upset and making...'

'Don't you dare blame this on me. There are people here who are disgusted at having to see you here. YOu have no reason to be here.'

'I was actually part of this cast, and I...'

'You were not part of this cast. You never deserved to be a part of this cast.'

I finally stood up and said 'Michael was a kind and compassionate man. I admired him, and he helped me a lot. I think he would have been glad I came, and further, I think I know whose behavior he would have been embarrassed by.'

So, I go home. And posted the above quotes on my facebook page. And yeah, I cut myself, too. Then I get a message from her.

That's right. There's more.

'I did not appreciate your little show tonight...'
'Saying that you came from respect for him was appalling...'
'If you did respect him, you should have shown that in some way that didn't make so many people so uncomfortable...'
'People hid in the bathroom because they didn't want to have to see you..'
'I don't even know how you knew about it, because it was supposed to be about the cast coming together for him, to be with each other and support each other...'

I posted that whole comment on my chain of quotes.

I said 'Sorry, T - but private communications get me in trouble these days. No one seems to believe me when I try to describe the venom and hatred I have to endure.'

She then proceeded to demand that i take down her words, or else she was going to start posting the backlog of things I had shared with her when we were friends.

She told me I was a liar, that everything I had ever said to her was a lie.

That I needed to stop playing the victim card and just come clean about everything I did wrong, own up to my own behavior. And that complaining that other people were being unreasonable was playing the victim card.

That she had seen me going around to all the little people swept to the side in the company, desparate for sympathy, and to find someone willing to believe I was a victim.

That I was a master emotional manipulator, and I was not going to manipulate her any more.

I made the comment that Michael was abused, and that he helped me a lot.

'I've gone through enough in the last 30 hours, I'm not going to go into his personal life with you.'

I told her I was hurt by the fact that they voted me out with a secret board meeting..'

'There you go again, playing the victim card. There was no secret board meeting.'

'Wait a minute - the email you sent me said that the board had discussed, and voted me out.'

'Well, yeah. We met online.'

'And had a vote?'

'yeah."

And I was not informed or invited to this meeting?'

'No.'

So the board met online, had a vote, and I was not informed of this, but there was no secret board meeting?'

'...'

'Well would you have invited this other person if you were voting to remove him?'

'That's an evasion, and yes, I would have had the balls to let him know what he was accused of.'

'well, I'm sorry, but I don't have any balls.'

'So was there a secret board meeting?'

'Look - just leave us alone. Your behavior has been terrible, and unbecoming of a board member. And stop telling everyone that it was this one thing that got you kicked off the board, when we both know there was a lot more than that.'

'That's another evasion. And what else was there?'

'Oh, I know. Conduct unbecoming a board member, my friend. I know. I'm not going to go through it, but I know it all, and you wouldn't want it all to be made public.'

'So vague threats, and more evasions....'

'You're the one evading me! Leave us alone!'

...

I'm sure if you had told everyone the truth, instead of all the lies you've made up, they'd know you were just playing the victim card for sympathy...

And on, and on. Threats to get the police involved, to tell everyone what she knew...

'That's what started this mess in the first place! YOu told J what I had said to you!'

'You are sadly misinformed. I never said anything to her.'

'I'm looking at the restraining order. It says, and I quote, 'A mutual friend on facebook told me that he was planning to contact me, and threatening to give me a hug.'

'And you assume that was me? I never told her a thing.'

'You're the only bloody person who was talking to me at the time, and you asked me a question, to which I responded about the hug. There was no one else!'

'...'

'Well, i don't believe I ever said anything to her...'

She's gone, she's blocked. Any further contact with her will just make me more miserable. I don't need her perfidity. I wish my wife were so blatant. T really isn't very good - it was too easy to pick her apart on the fly. I trained against the best.

But I will say...

Those attacks struck deep. And they're going to echo for a long time.

This woman was present at my son's birth. I moved their furnature in a snowstorm while they were on vacation. Alone. And I was glad to do it. She sat beside me at my first DV session. It wasn't one sided, it was a deep friendship.

Time for alittle more rubbing alcohol before bed.