Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group

Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.

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nemesis6 11/10/2007

please help me, i dont know what to do! everything was actually starting to cheer up and fall into place, when suddenly my brother gets a job in london and decides to live with us.
hes a perverted psychopath (iv just found out). he never used to be.
but such is life. look i really need some advice, i'm trapped totally screwed and beginning to feel suicidal again.
hes so sick! i cant even look at him. hes not "doing anything" sexual to me. even thouh i'm worried that he might cuz his mind is so sick!
i cant move out cuz my pay check aint high enough, and he wont move out cuz he enjoys the psychological abuse hes inflicting. hes also an alcholic and threatening to get violent. i need some advice, PLEASE! i'm stuffed and desperate.
thanx

psyc 11/10/2007

what does your family think about this? try and stay away from him as much as possible.are you still living with your parents?

deleted_user 11/10/2007

I cannot imagine your parents condoning his behavior. You need to talk with them and let them know about your fears. Hopefully they will support you and help him to get the therapy he needs or else kick him out. If they don't you really need to check into other living arrangement options - perhaps sharing a place with friends and splitting the expenses. At the very least he needs to get help with his alcohol addiction - AA or detox or both, and then see what other issues go away. If they don't, he will need further psychological help, but above all, you need to STAY SAFE.

Catharsis 11/10/2007

I'm sorry, that sounds awful. I'm not in the exact same predicament (more emotional abuse and threatened physical abuse from my brother than the threat of sexual abuse), but feel trapped. No money to move out on my own, and don't think I can anyways because I feel incompetent. My dad won't force my brother to move out. The rest of my family is scared of my brother and have very helpless personalities. No one but my immediate family knows about this.

If you can pay for it or find low-cost counselling, go for it. It's the only thing that has kept me from falling off a cliff this year - having someone to vent to. My university counselling center gives $25 individual sessions, with the first 3 being free.

If you feel in danger, call the police. Do you have a friend you'd feel comfortable staying with? Maybe look for low-cost housing or move in with a group of people to lower rent costs.

Don't let the anger consume you - that's what he wants. Hang in there.

nemesis6 11/11/2007

thanks guys, great advice i knew i could rely on you! however, my mum has told him that he cant stay here ad that he has to go. so what he did was, he limited the time he stays here from the whole week down to a few days. sounds great right? no, it just means that he has to put more anguish into the experience when he comes. so, i decided to be pro-active and i went down the local hardware store and bought a lock for my bedroom door and one for my mums. heaven knows shes more afraid of him than me! he stayed 4 days last week. at least i have somewhere safe i can go even if i cant move out yet.
my sisters know what hes like. so when they were younger they moved 100 miles north to ever prevent this from happening to them!
so, i'm safe thanks guys but we cant get rid of him. he said he'd go, just come back to pick up his stuff.
he did that, but he never picked up any of his stuff, he left it all here! even though i'm safe, i still have to live with him, and hes just going to get worse.

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