Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hi all:
More deprivation yesterday. I got off work and called my wife. I was on my way home. She said she was cleaning and she gets like crazy OCD when she's cleaning so I try and stay out of the way. So I said I would stop at my frined Bob's for a few. She doesnt like me to stop there asI have a few friends who hang out and drink there. But I DON"T drink there, certainly not on a weeknight. They are my only social life outside of her. I work and I come home to her every day. I have no other firends that I talk to on a regular basis. I go there just to get away from her abuse otherwise I'd be in prison. We got in a hiuge fight and I came home.
Later in the night, she asked me to call for an estimate for spring cleaning. We don't really need it, just a few twigs and leaves but she wanted it done. I have a brain injury and used to do all this and now I can't. So I asked her if I could have them just turn the dirt in our back garden. An area of about 4x4 feet so I could just plant a few tomato plants. She said "No, I'm not paying for that". A two minute job for them. I said I would pay for it. She said no dont ask them. I said should I have them do a separate job just for me> She said yes. I can't even begin to tell you how angry this made me.
I am trying to be positive this spring and plant some flowers and tomatoes maybe. Well heaven forbid I do something that makes ME HAPPY. Planting vegetables? How terrible of me.
I must say I fel t belittled, deprived, angry and like a part of me was being taken away. I was laying in bed later and she comes up to me and says "Awww why don't you love me". I said cause I cant even plant a friggin garden for myself!
Each time something like this happens it just takes another part of you. But you can be damned sure I WILL be planting a few tomato plants this soring and I will do it my damned self!
Martin
More deprivation yesterday. I got off work and called my wife. I was on my way home. She said she was cleaning and she gets like crazy OCD when she's cleaning so I try and stay out of the way. So I said I would stop at my frined Bob's for a few. She doesnt like me to stop there asI have a few friends who hang out and drink there. But I DON"T drink there, certainly not on a weeknight. They are my only social life outside of her. I work and I come home to her every day. I have no other firends that I talk to on a regular basis. I go there just to get away from her abuse otherwise I'd be in prison. We got in a hiuge fight and I came home.
Later in the night, she asked me to call for an estimate for spring cleaning. We don't really need it, just a few twigs and leaves but she wanted it done. I have a brain injury and used to do all this and now I can't. So I asked her if I could have them just turn the dirt in our back garden. An area of about 4x4 feet so I could just plant a few tomato plants. She said "No, I'm not paying for that". A two minute job for them. I said I would pay for it. She said no dont ask them. I said should I have them do a separate job just for me> She said yes. I can't even begin to tell you how angry this made me.
I am trying to be positive this spring and plant some flowers and tomatoes maybe. Well heaven forbid I do something that makes ME HAPPY. Planting vegetables? How terrible of me.
I must say I fel t belittled, deprived, angry and like a part of me was being taken away. I was laying in bed later and she comes up to me and says "Awww why don't you love me". I said cause I cant even plant a friggin garden for myself!
Each time something like this happens it just takes another part of you. But you can be damned sure I WILL be planting a few tomato plants this soring and I will do it my damned self!
Martin
I hope you have a wonderful time planting your little garden. Just take it slow and listen to birds singing and feel the sunshine on your face. She can't take that away from you.
I got things I wanted to do invalidated too... if I happened to be listening to or watching something when mine came into the room or house, it would be, "What the hell is that??" or sometimes, he wouldn't even ask - he`d just turn it off or change it without saying anything. Recognise the, "Why don't you love me?" after something like that as well. I felt like responding exactly as you did.
Sorry again. I really hope you get a chance to leave and be happy some day soon...
PLANT YOUR FLOWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Please take good
care of yourself!!!!
YOU are a FLOWER
on the stem of
the universe.
Thrive, blossom and BLOOM.