Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
I just dont know what to think, do, say or anything anymore. The last few days I have been so full of stress, anger and sadness.
I had to comfort my daughter last night because she started crying because she misses my ex's nephew, whom she was very attached too! He joined the military and is away anyhow..but not the point!! I still talk to my ex's sister (mother of the nephew) so we are going to arrange for my daughter to see him the week he is home on leave.
All of this just filled me with sadness for her and anger that he has done this to not only me but her! She is the "daughter he never" and he "misses her so much" but he has hurt her in this messed up process he pulled on me!
To top off that, I wake up this morning to 2 messages from him telling me just how much he misses her. He asked if he could pick her up take her to dairy queen for ice cream and to the park for a few hours. He proceeds to tell me if she misses him and his son than I should let him do this and he would keep her for as long as I would like. He goes on to say I could go on a date, hang out with my boyfriend (which I do NOT have) or do whatever I wanted to do. Unfortunately I did message him back a very short/ brief message saying I will talk to her (which I will NOT) and I also said I dont know why you assume I have a bf, my priorities are much more than any man!
I know I shouldn't have even messaged him back but...but nothing..I'm so full of anger towards him that I couldn't help myself. I would have loved to said LOADS more to him, but I will post that in Kaz's post of what would you say instead of sending to him!!
I had to comfort my daughter last night because she started crying because she misses my ex's nephew, whom she was very attached too! He joined the military and is away anyhow..but not the point!! I still talk to my ex's sister (mother of the nephew) so we are going to arrange for my daughter to see him the week he is home on leave.
All of this just filled me with sadness for her and anger that he has done this to not only me but her! She is the "daughter he never" and he "misses her so much" but he has hurt her in this messed up process he pulled on me!
To top off that, I wake up this morning to 2 messages from him telling me just how much he misses her. He asked if he could pick her up take her to dairy queen for ice cream and to the park for a few hours. He proceeds to tell me if she misses him and his son than I should let him do this and he would keep her for as long as I would like. He goes on to say I could go on a date, hang out with my boyfriend (which I do NOT have) or do whatever I wanted to do. Unfortunately I did message him back a very short/ brief message saying I will talk to her (which I will NOT) and I also said I dont know why you assume I have a bf, my priorities are much more than any man!
I know I shouldn't have even messaged him back but...but nothing..I'm so full of anger towards him that I couldn't help myself. I would have loved to said LOADS more to him, but I will post that in Kaz's post of what would you say instead of sending to him!!
I dont know if you would say he's trying to manipulate me but he's throwing in again how much he loves and misses her and how she will always be his little girl (she isnt his but she called him dad for the pasy year)
I did read your last journal entry and I see you have found out your abuser will do or say ANYTHING to get you to stay. I'm so sorry for all that you have been through.
Your daughter-- not his does not want to see him. I FULLY understand. He is using YOUR daughter to get to you. You do not need an excuse, she is your daughter. Just say no.
You really do need no contact with him, or he will make you crazy.
I guess just keep ignoring these messages and maybe he will stop or I bet you could block his email address.
I wish you the very best of luck and please take care of yourself and stay safe.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
He's so full of it!!!
He's just used your daughter to find out whether it not u have a bf. the "I miss her can u take her off your hands for a while" was a diversion to ask you "have u got a bf?"
I'm so sorry Hun that your being guilt tripped by him,
Honestly the last time I heard from my ex he was all like "I saw u in your car the other day you was in your new car, is it a black one? you was with some bloke!"
I just said "it wasn't me, I don't have a black car!" I wouldn't even confirm for him that I have no bf, if he's fishing for info he can ask me straight and I'd tell him straight "it's none of your business, we r not together anymore!"
My advice is this and u don't have to take it but I hope that one day you'll be in the place where u can say this and you don't care, but I'd tell him that he can see his daughter when he significantly proves himself to put her first. It's on his shoulders to do this and however he proves to you that he can be trusted is his call, if he doesn't bother Hun you'll know that he's only interested in you (like my ex) and getting his victim back under his control. Also I'd ask him to in future reframe from sniffing around underhandedly for information about your private personal life that has nothing to do with him.
Now wouldn't that feel great to say that to him? To take control of his slyness and underhanded reverse psychology.
You have every right to be angry but don't allow him to make your anger eat u up, you don't deserve that! Nothing wrong with healthy anger, so vent in here!
They are all the same ! It's all games, take yourself out the game Hun, it's so much better!