Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hi DS Friends! I have been coming here for the past few months reading posts and getting strength from you all. Some days I wanted to reply to your posts, but was too lazy to pull out my laptop (I've been visiting on my tablet or phone and hate typing a lot from both), :-) I have been praying for you all though... old members as well as new. Here's my update... It's been since May that I decided to take control from him and went no contact. The block is still on my phone. He has stayed away for the most part. I did run into him in August or September. I went into a store and he saw me. All of a sudden I get a text message from him. He used an app to contact me and made it appear that it was his number. He is definitely blocked by Sprint. I didn't see him, but he saw me. He decided to insult me. He wrote, I see you in the store. Are you pregnant? I promise you I don't look pregnant, but it was enough to piss me off real bad. The nerve of him. After all this time, he still wants to break me down. He is the one that took all my money and mentally abused me for so long and when he does see me, he insults me. Typical. My son tried to keep contact with him and called him one day for money. He had a female yelling through the phone to my son, not to call back. He upset my son so much, I blocked him from contacting him as well. He's never been there for my son and trust me, he cares nothing about the boy. I recently cut ties with my therapist. He started acting very strange and was very much out of line. He kept hugging me and telling me that he loves me. I'm not good with confrontation, so it took time to tell him how I felt. I told him how I felt and he started treating me really bad after that. Every time I would go to him, he would start off apologizing about something he did or said to me last week. He helped me a lot, but I think he and I have gone as far as we can go. Last week, he wanted to finish an argument with me, so I decided to walk out of the session 10 minutes after it started. Enough is enough. I am not about to repeat old cycles and become victim to him. Right now, I'm trying to figure things out on my own. If I feel later on I need therapy, I'll find another therapist. Right now I am "therapied" out. I do still think about my ex a lot, but it's all anger. I just want to get to the day, where he is no longer a thought. I do feel I am over him as far as wanting him, but I still feel he has a hold on me. I'm lonely now and probably a little vulnerable. I just want to stop. It has been over 6 months and I can't seem to move on. I want love with someone else and feel I'm ready, but I also have a wall and I think so much about my ex, even though it's anger, but I feel it's obsessive and I don't want to do that. Anyway, I'm still here. So much better than I started, but still feel I have quite a ways to go. Hugs, hugs, hugs to you all. :-)
Yes, I know anger very well. I know how it feels to feel like I'm being consumed by processing the abuse, and feeling like the long term damage that was done in a way means he still has that control, and that I'm not rid of it yet. However, all that is part of the process and gets better. O feel much less angry than I ever have before right now. Less anxiety. I feel more in control than I have in a long time because I am aware of how the abuse effected me and I can work on it-taking that control back. I fully believe it is because I went through the healing process, and will continue to, to the best of my ability. Not denying, avoiding, stuffing feelings, taking down walls, thinking about my feelings and behaviors, facing all that. Like what you are doing.
Please think seriously about reporting that psychologist to the APA (if he's a member), or another authority. What he did is really wrong. Therapy is supposed to be a safe place, free from pressure, where the therapist can be trusted totally. A bad therapist can do a lot of damage, THIS guy goes WAY beyond a bad therapist. If he is doing this to do you he may have, or will do this to others. It really needs to be stopped.
I read and hear in your post strength and courage,though your going through rough times you I believe will find yourself and blossom.
Wishing you all the best.
I know the anger very well too - probably everyone here does. It lasts for quite some time and for me time is the only thing that heals. Stay strong with the no contact - I'm trying to do the same right now only for me its been 3 days not 6 months. Your doing really good considering everything you have been through. i hope you feel less lonely - that was my weakness too but these guys are not really going to fill that void.. it's not love it's abuse.