Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
UGH...........................
It took everything in me not to slap him in his face.
So as I have said he has a girlfriend and I recently posted that he forgot his kids because of her.
Yesterday he worked from home which was really odd for him lately so I already had my radar up. I (not him) noticed something wrong with my 3 year old daughter (nothing life threatening) that she needed to see the Dr for. Being he was working from home (which for him meant he had the day off because he doesn't work when he "works from home") I asked him if he could take our daughter to the Dr because he was home. He said, "I am not sure because I have conference calls today", which again was odd because if he has them doing them wherever was never a problem before, again more radar went up....
I made an appointment for my daughter for 2:50pm which was first available they had yesterday. I called him to let know and he became VERY upset and mad telling me he had conference calls and he would have to reschedule her appointment. I said "Why the hell are you yelling at me???" He immediately calmed down and said he wasn't upset (LIE), I told him to figure it out and hung up on him.
He sent me a text short time later telling me he cancelled my daughters appointment and rescheduled it for today.......
I got stuck in a meeting at work and sent my ex a text asking if he could pick up the kids for me (I have done it so many times already). He sent a response "I cant, sorry"......... I thought, hmmmmm, ok......
I left work to get my kids in time and when I got home he was not there, actually he didn't come home until almost 3am (but whatever).
I found out this morning through an email that was in our joint account that he spent the entire day with his girlfriend yesterday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He took her to the gun range at 12pm yesterday. I also found out that on Monday he took her to dinner and brought home left overs from his date and offered them to me to eat, Uhhhh no thanks. He was spotted by some friends of ours at a restaurant with her. He told me he was with his friend at the restaurant and even fabricated this elaborate story about their conversation......
That P.O.S AGAIN chose her over his kids, especially his daughter who needed to see a Dr. That is WHY he stayed home and couldn't take her to the dr.
I lost it this morning....... I woke his ass up and told him that I knew about his girlfriend (which he didn't know I knew before), that I knew he lied and that I don't give a shit what he does or who he does it with until it starts affecting my kids. He tried to tell me he doesn't have a girlfriend, that he did have conference calls yesterday and he did them at the gun range (WTF, really?!?!?) blah blah blah blah blah is all I heard out of his fkn mouth!
I proceeded to tell him that I want him to know that I am watching him and that I trust NOTHING he says and now that he has chose her over his kids twice he better watch his step.
I am on FIRE! I just want him OUT of my house!
P.S. Thank you god for continued clarity and forgive me for my potty mouth.
It took everything in me not to slap him in his face.
So as I have said he has a girlfriend and I recently posted that he forgot his kids because of her.
Yesterday he worked from home which was really odd for him lately so I already had my radar up. I (not him) noticed something wrong with my 3 year old daughter (nothing life threatening) that she needed to see the Dr for. Being he was working from home (which for him meant he had the day off because he doesn't work when he "works from home") I asked him if he could take our daughter to the Dr because he was home. He said, "I am not sure because I have conference calls today", which again was odd because if he has them doing them wherever was never a problem before, again more radar went up....
I made an appointment for my daughter for 2:50pm which was first available they had yesterday. I called him to let know and he became VERY upset and mad telling me he had conference calls and he would have to reschedule her appointment. I said "Why the hell are you yelling at me???" He immediately calmed down and said he wasn't upset (LIE), I told him to figure it out and hung up on him.
He sent me a text short time later telling me he cancelled my daughters appointment and rescheduled it for today.......
I got stuck in a meeting at work and sent my ex a text asking if he could pick up the kids for me (I have done it so many times already). He sent a response "I cant, sorry"......... I thought, hmmmmm, ok......
I left work to get my kids in time and when I got home he was not there, actually he didn't come home until almost 3am (but whatever).
I found out this morning through an email that was in our joint account that he spent the entire day with his girlfriend yesterday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He took her to the gun range at 12pm yesterday. I also found out that on Monday he took her to dinner and brought home left overs from his date and offered them to me to eat, Uhhhh no thanks. He was spotted by some friends of ours at a restaurant with her. He told me he was with his friend at the restaurant and even fabricated this elaborate story about their conversation......
That P.O.S AGAIN chose her over his kids, especially his daughter who needed to see a Dr. That is WHY he stayed home and couldn't take her to the dr.
I lost it this morning....... I woke his ass up and told him that I knew about his girlfriend (which he didn't know I knew before), that I knew he lied and that I don't give a shit what he does or who he does it with until it starts affecting my kids. He tried to tell me he doesn't have a girlfriend, that he did have conference calls yesterday and he did them at the gun range (WTF, really?!?!?) blah blah blah blah blah is all I heard out of his fkn mouth!
I proceeded to tell him that I want him to know that I am watching him and that I trust NOTHING he says and now that he has chose her over his kids twice he better watch his step.
I am on FIRE! I just want him OUT of my house!
P.S. Thank you god for continued clarity and forgive me for my potty mouth.
You know the truth, that you love your kids and he loves nothing. Yes, he's putting his gf above his kids, but not because he loves her, just because she can give him more than his kids can.
As an adult, I see this very clearly with my own father, since my mother died. I am "useful", nothing more. I lost most of my usefulness when he met his gf (who is wonderful and I wish I could tell her to stay away), because his focus is sex and money. I am (thankfully) not sexually attractive to him and I have no money.
Your ex is no different. If (when?) he breaks up with this gf, he may really want time with his kids, may pretend to value them etc, until he finds the next woman. And then the kids won't matter.
Document, document, document. Don't let your kids grow up being the backdrop, the chorus line, the bit part that only matters when there's nobody "important" on the stage. I know you won't, and I'm sorry I went off on a rant but ... bottom line is he will never get it and your kids are SO lucky that you do.
If you want some peace only focus on yourself, and forget about what he does from day to day. His girlfriend is in the beginning stages of an abusive relationship so soon it will not be a bed of roses for her either.
I wish you only the best and really hope you take GOOD care of yourself.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))
He did his conference calls AT THE GUN RANGE!? What a moron. Not only did he tell you he couldn't do the conference calls in a quiet doctor's office, then he turns around and tells you he did them at a LOUD ASS GUN RANGE!?
IF he had actually had conference calls (obv not), imagine what his colleagues would have thought with that noise going on in the background. Sheesh.
I'm with Livn, keep writing this down. Eventually, I'll bet you dollars to donuts that he will take you to court seeking custody (ask me how I know this), and you'll want every last bit of this bull documented.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with this crap. I can't wait until his sorry ass is out of your house!
yikes
ooooo you are right, I am jumping all over the place.
I feel angry, I betrayed, I feel hurt, I have totally accepted this and I am happy I am out but part of me really feels like "Damn, what does she have that I didn't that makes him so GAGA?" "The email had a picture of her shooting from behind with her ass sticking out and him saying to his friends "OMG!"
UGH.... When he is gone I think I am going to be soooo happy because I won't have to look at him anymore.
I can't wait until he is gone----for your sake and happiness....so that you can continue to grow and be the kind person you have shown (serious shown me in the short time I have been on this board) that you are.
KEEP STRONG!!!