I enjoy doing things with my kids,when they were young and now that they are older. I never thought about the enthusiasm part. I always have a good time with them, but when they were your kid's ages, I'm positive they had more enthusiasm then I did. It doesn't matter if you fall asleep when you get home. The only thin that matters is that you get to spend time with your kids and that is what they will remember.
Sending support and hugs!!!

I was a single parent for many years while maintaining a traveling job. Not a day went by where I wasn't exhausted. I had three sons who always had something going on and sometimes had to be in two places at once. I never missed any game they play...or anything they felt important to them. I did everything with my sons. I took them away with me on vacations..woke them in the middle of the night during snow storms and drove until it was hot and sunny. We went to movies, concerts (none of the music was my taste)..libraries, and dinners out in fine restaurants.
My sons are men now. I have so many memories I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. When I sit with them and their families or girlfriends for dinner now...its all about what we all did when they were kids. I get a warm spot in my heart knowing they knew how hard it was for me back then, but I loved them enough to spend my time with them. They especially like to make fun of me for singing and torturing them with me "oldies" music all the way down to Florida.

I know how hard it is. I used to drag myself. But then it became easy. Today my sons would do anything in the world for me. And believe me...one day you will look back and wonder where the time went. I am now a Grandma...and until I die...my lil one will see Zoo's, aquariums..and anything I can do to have those memories with her as well.

Find the joy.

Ahh babyrena, is it possible you might be a bit depressed? Or simply exhausted. Try some nutritional supplements, multi-vitamins, etc. and perhaps a herbal remedy for depression too? Something like St. John's Wort. Anything to add to your vitality. If you keep at it, it will help after a few months. xxx

You sound like a wonderful mom, babyrena. Don't kick yourself for being too tired to do something. Being in an abusive relationship sucks away your energy and we all know there is a lot of energy already in working, doing chores, and keeping the family together.

On the other hand, I completely agree with the others who have posted about the value of spending time with your kids when they are young. Mine are older teens now and don't want to go places with me or do things like they used to, which is kinda sad. And yes, they do remember those good times together, and recall them in a much clearer way than I do with great joy.

It's a balancing act all the time, I guess. I would say be kind to yourself first, give yourself love and understanding for your energy levels and any other needs you might have. Then you will have more energy to give.