Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
About a month and a half, almost two months ago I ended a two year long physical and emotionally abusive relationship. Since things have ended, I have seen my abuser a few times, but things dont feel the same anymore. I know I'm over him, and that the abuse is nothing I want to endure ever again, but I can't help having this feeling of being lost. It's like I don't know who I am anymore. I constantly feel angry or depressed and I can't figure out why. I know, what happened isn't my fault, but I can't help feeling like I could've been smarter...or could have done something to prevent it from happening. It's almost as if no one understands..because they say "well you aren't with him anymore"..but just because the physical scars have healed, doesn't mean the ones inside have. I guess im just looking for clarity; that these range of emotions I am feeling is normal...
In a way, it makes sense that you'd feel this loss of identity, anger, and depression. While in the relationship you're in survival mode, you are in coping mode, the get-through-the-day mode. Now that the threat is gone you are processing through layers of emotions. All of it is completely normal and can be worked through with patience and perseverance.